Grossed out and need to vent—I just caught Mom using my toothbrush to comb her hair!

We just got back from having lunch at the new place where mom is going to check in on Tuesday.

SecSis, I read her the story about the gentleman who chose happiness at his NH and she related. Thanks for that again.

She's not over the moon about it but understands that this is the right answer for us all.

the place is amazing and the residents and staff are wonderful. It's really pretty in there and the owners are hands on. I watch the residents faces when they see one of the owners and their faces light up which I think tells a lot.

Thanks everybody for being so supportive to me and thanks also for dreaming about the boat ride!

lovbob

one time my ex husband and I baked a chocolate cake for a theatre group's opening night where he was performing. We made it all nice and by the time we got to the theatre, my ex says: let me go in and see if they have enough food.

Well he comes out and says: They have enough; leave the cake in the car!

To get to the punch line; we took the cake all the way back home and ate it that night. The whole cake.
man and woman vs Cake. trust me, the cake won in the END!

happy you and Keith had a *good time* with the man vs food marathon and that slight nap........

lovbob

Oh okay. I've never seen that.

man vs food.. a guy named adam goes around to different restaurants and takes on their challenges.. you know.. eat a 7lb burrito in an hour win a t-shirt etc... pretty good..

I just did the grocery shopping thing. Now I'm tired. I was thinking about the getting the elderly to eat thing and it's funny how Mom can remember that she's sick of a food but not the answer to a question she asked 5 minutes ago. So very strange.

LOL Kelley. That sounds like a very good date. BTW, what is a man vs. food marathon?

umm my date.. well err...*cough*

we had chinese and then watched a man vs food marathon..then slept.. a little..

Girls, Kelly needs to keep some secrets. Sister sez. Hello all, I don't mind monkeys or birds, as long as they know their place. As for rude comments, I wish the offenders knew their place as well. What is the saying? If you don't have something good to say, it's better to say nothing at all. We definitely need to be able to vent somewhere. This has been very therapeutic. People are laughing, who came here looking for refuge from life's storms. Coming to this thread has been happy sailing, and a camaraderie of lightened spirits. We are dreaming and planning and having fun, as a small break from the dreary realities of the difficult job of caregiving for those who forgot how to have fun. We haven't, and through this boat expedition, our imaginations are fired up and free. Some of us are already counting down the days for the spree.

Happy Sunday Afternoon, Girlie Friends!!

Hubby and I are cleaning up clutter, washing draperies, etc. today. My dear sweet niece is coming to visit for one night this week. I can wait to see her!!

I sure hope I never offend or hurt any of you. If I ever do, please tell me. I'm such a worrier. :)

Yes, Kelley. Tell us about your date!!

love,
miz

HI guys Maxine here as for that widow being so high and mighty good for her if she has good memories -wonder if her husband would have I am a widow and I can relate very well to all of you and agree we should be able to vent or piss and moan here that is what it is all about-and since I was a nurse and have poo petrol I will clean up for the birds and whatever else on the boat and also am good at upchuck I was a nurse when we really took care of people ourselves as for criticism just ignor it the only time I got my knickers in a bunch is when someone asked me if 195 was my age and I went to her board and gave my answer I did not want to embarrass her on the message board. I love you all and hope at times I can be of some help-I got so much support when I needed it from others and want to pay forward. How are your winters going we have so much more snow this winter than usuall-I am lucky that my son does my drive or if he can't my neighbor's son will do it for me but I am so glad not to have to be at work at 7am anymore and very happy to be inside take care friends

Cap'n Cook is the name of our mascot parrot. I think that SecSis and Miz and I like the idea of a cyber parrot but we're not too keen on the freak out aspects such as: Giant eye plucking beak, slippery surprises who knows where and i don't know if I can steer the boat with the parrot perched on the wheel.
Kind of a funny image though.

ok whew. i don't want to hurt anyone. and thank you for the compliment on this thread. You make me feel so good because at the end of the day I want to know that someone somewhere feels better than they did before they got here and realized that we're all in the same BOAT!

Thanks for the hugs and for being here KelleyBean!

ok... so how was the date? harhar hmmmm... musta been a good date........

lovbob

bobbie..why in the world are you apologizing? i dont think ANY of us has any reason to apologize. on the contrary, if it wasnt for you making this thread we'd still be hiding under little rocks.. ok well i know i would lol

*hugs*

Hey KelleyBean!

You just got home!?! WooHoo.

goodforyougoodforyougoodforyou

love you lots and happy to *see* you!

I'm sorry if I made burrs.

lovbob

Oh, Pirate, that sux so bad. We could have been sisters, no kidding.
I really understand you because I have experienced a lot of the same craziness but my mom, thank God, didn't wind up in psych but could have.

the materialism, the 'things, my things' to my mom were way more important than me and my health. NPD also.

Now, as I have mentioned earlier, the dementia has taken the broken personality away and after many years of suffering emotional and mental abuse I finally have the sweet mama I always longed for. probably this is why it is so hard for me to let go because I worked so hard to get her to not be mean to me.

Pirate, hang in there and maybe you'll luck out and the dementia will take the bad stuff away. maybe she will be a sweet mama to you

bittersweet it is for me and a heartbreaker too. Literally broke my heart.

You enjoy Miz's chocolate. I have the feeling that she will only send the very best!

love you Pirate and Miz.

lovbob

Morning or Afternoon which the case may be for my friends.. Looks like i missed a lot last night.. i had a date with Keith and well.. i just got home hehe...

i read back over the posts and ill try to go in order, though forgive me if i miss something..

#1 I think its safe to say.. never ever attack someone on here and DO NOT assume people were mistreated as kids, etc..A) you look silly... B) it just puts a burr in the Sisterhood


#2 Bobbie, sometimes things dont work out for a reason.. im quite sure youre smart enough to find an even better place for your mom!!

#3 is Cap'n Cook the name of our pet parrot or someones new name? hehe

#4 Pirate, i admire you for continuing taking care of your mom after everything. Not everyone is as strong to keep doing what youre doing. and still keep their humor =)

everyone have a wonderful day!! *hugs n kisses*

Wow, Pirate. What a horrible ordeal!! I'm so sorry you had to go through that. You're an angel for taking care of your mom. I'm sending some chocolate to you over the net. It's very very good. :)

Sis, well last year she really was getting all crazy about my dad's two cars that are at her house. She never drove a car in her life, so I always figured and she always told me the cars would be mine. I had been taking care of them for the past 10 years. Well one day early last year she gets a bug up her bum about the cars. She brought me the pink slips out and said you take them over. I said do we have to do that right now, for god's sakes we had waited all this time and she started raving on and on and finally I grabbed the paperwork through them in another room and said OK I will just do it. Then she flip flop and say OH NO, and wanted the paperwork back (because mind you my parents where very MATERIALISTIC and never wanted me to have more than they did even though they touted another story.) I said too late I am going to do it, it should have been done a long time ago. The next working day I went to the DMV and transferred easily both cars into my name 30 bucks later...finally done and it was simple and easy. Okay so here is the next part where more raving starts. Now my mom starts a giagantic rampage about the car insurance. The paperwork had come rencently for renewal on both the vehicles. I took them and called up the insurance co which was the same I used and put both cars into my name, okay again done - again easy yes. I am sure you are all following this and saying okay yes that should have been done and yeah it's easy to do. Okay now I tell my mom, I put both cars in my name and the insurance is in my name. Well she totally flipped about all of that. How could I put the cars in my name how could that be so easily done with out her..no it could not be done. Raved on and on about that. No the insurance could not be done so easily over the phone and she has to have input. I told all is done, all is done. No she would not believe any of it, and raved and raged and went on and on for weeks and weeks and weeks. The crazy phone calls would go on and on and on the lectures would go on and on, it was intolerable mentally. One friday night I called up some agency on aging and was balling on the phone to someone on the other end who was nice enough to sit there for a long time listening to me. See what yo have to understand was my mom was always a little nutz never would listen to me nor would respect me as an adult. So she could not handle me having or taking control of anything even though I am an adult. My parents never respected me as an adult. You don't know what kind of mental hell I had to grow up with. So I digress sorry. Okay so now after weeks and weeks of this insanity (lots of crazy phone messages one after another) on one Saturday I wanted to go to some area events with my b/f just for some getaway time. So before we left I took the phone off the hook. So we went to our first event and left around 4:00 in the afternoon. When I got back to my car there were some cell phone messages from my aunt saying something about when she calls over there someone else is answerring the phone. But when I called over there no one would answer. So I told my b/f that we better stop by before going to the next event. Well when I got over there no one answered the door and the neighbor from across the street said they took her with the ambulance down the stree to the hospital. So we went to emergency and found her there with a neighbor.
She had totally freaked out because the phone was off the hook and I guess she mentally blew up, cause she went to different neighbors doors and had some crazy story to tell them. What I finally gleaned what the story was is she said the neighbor across the street (of whom she started her own crazy war with these new people that moved it sometime previously) had me put into jail...go figure on how she dreamed that up. Her NPD and onset dementia perhaps some mini strokes where all at work here. Well after going to emergency they said she had to be on a 72 hour hold for eval. And they had to transfer her to a hospital that had a psych ward. And that's how she got some of her meds prescribed. I made a mistake about 4 weeks ago where I let her not take them. I think that's where all the whining and the constipation stories came up. Well it's been 4 weeks now that's she been back oh her meds and she's much more cognizant. Now I know she has to stay on the psych meds. I learned my lesson....lol
It's very tough to have a parent that already put you through mental and emotional hell just for that to be even more exasburated by on-set dementia...oye yeh (slaps forehead)...
where's some chocolate...lol
Nice story eh?

Good Morning Ship Mates!! Love you too, bobbie!!

Night Night Miz Demi.
Love you
Bob

Good night, everyone. Sweet dream!!

love,
miz

Maybe my hubby could swab the deck. He'll need something to do after all. ;)

bobbie, I agree with that. No more poo!!

Secret Sister that post is beautiful! Thanks!

Parrots freak me out a little too and i also think it's the beak. Maybe we could teach it how to open Corona beer bottles.

I did have a little parrot once and ended up giving him to a good home when I went on the road. he had a big cage and could actually get some speed up in there and would crap on the wall when he made the turn.

it's fun to play with the idea, but man I don't want to clean up anything that comes out of the south end of anything anymore!

Piratess, your mom was in a Psych ward? Whatever for?

Hahahahaha bobbie! I love it!

There's a huge bird at a store we visit. He's very colorful. He is interesting to look a, but the way he follows us about kinda freaks me out. Must be the beak.

Cap'n Cook... and then when the Coast Guard wants to know;
Who is the Captain of this vessel? We flip them the bird... so to speak.

buncha women standing around looking at their feet while the parrot steps up.....

LOL bobbie!! Pirate, my mom is not frail either. She's under 5 foot and is about 170. She's just not very active. She was slender when she was younger.

mis if you are asking me nope my mom is not frail...my mom is under 5 foot and is 187 lbs...german mama