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Haven't been here in ages. Was just watching a movie about fate. I never used to believe in fate. But I just heard the protagonist in the movie say, "I think fate's behind everything."

I wonder...
Maybe it's true.

Here I Am
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Hi hereiam.
At my age it is so confusing. We had a here i am and an i am here. One of them went off to ER with abdominal pains and was never heard of again, and one left. Which one are you?
I think it is more random chaos myself--life, that is-- though snowflakes and cut cabbages and have some very intricately sculpted patterns. If you watch the life of a single cell it is really quite intricate as well. It's anyone's guess, I think............
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Just want to say , if you listening Needshelp, stay safe you have a hurricane coming, I am sending your and your family and your beautiful city much prayers and love, and will be thinking of you.
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I am thinking of and missing needs help all the time, Nacy. I can't believe she left us this long without telling us she was going away! Makes me very worried for her. Was told she occ. does take a vaca from us without a work. Still, I know she was wearing a heart monitor when she left us. I don't like it.
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I know alva, me too. I actually had needs email and erased it 😔 so mad at myself for that.
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I was thinking the same last night while watching the hurricane report.
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Also Alva, not sure if you where still here, a very good family friend of her daughters that it sounded like spent much time at her home growing up. Suddenly died, I can't remember if it was a car accident or what, but it was devastating to her and her family.

Which makes me worry more about her health issues, with that stress.

That was pretty much her last few post.
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Also wondering about Need
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Update: My DD brought me home to DH today! I had a slight delay on discharge when a last minute gut reset ncluding abdominal exray was performed.
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Llama ,

You must be so happy !!
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Way: Thank you. I am.
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Llama, what GREAT news. Please take care and be careful with yourself.
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Llama ((((((hugs))))) So glad you are better and at home!!!
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Thinking good thoughts for you Llama! 🦙️🥝🥝🥝🦙️
Glad you are home and well cared for.
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So glad you're home Llama , take good care of yourself 💕
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Llama, Praise The Lord that you are home. May HE continue to heal your body and be with you and DH.
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Golden, Nacy, ITRR, Alva and Send: Thank you very much.
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Don't know where to put this but it is very much on my mind - the house is sold as of last night.

I've already sent the necessary documents to the lawyer. Possession day is Oct 7th. They will take all the furniture that is left in the house which is a great blessing. We were going to drive up to take the plants etc, but I am thinking I will leave the plants and get someone to bring down the last few things which are not much (a few pictures on the walls). I can send the keys I have up the my realtor. Most of them are already in the house.

R had his assessment and they were concerned about his eyes and balance so he needs to see some specialists - eyes, head and neck injuries, maybe more. It's just over 2 months from the accident and his eye issues and dizziness are still there to some extent. He functions very well, has no problems when sitting down, or on the computer unless he stays on it too long, but does have them when standing and walking at times (like down stairs) though not that I notice around the condo or when we are out walking.

Anyhoo - thank goodness the house is sold and I don't have to keep paying those bills and getting people to look after it, The strange thing was that we got a much higher offer yesterday, but it was too late. I had already signed and the buyers met the conditions.

Such a busy time for both of us!!!
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@Golden ,

Glad the house is settled .
Sorry about R’s persistent symptoms .
Make sure he drinks enough . Dehydration can make those symptoms more bothersome .
🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
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Golden,
So glad for you.
All went well even if it took some months
So good they take furniture.
Hope R will see specialists soon and improve some or little more every day.
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Golden: Congratulations on the sale of the house. Prayers for R.
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Oh, Golden, so glad on the house. ONE thing off your mind. I know there will still be stuff, but what a relief they also took furniture. Moves are dreadful hard.
I hate balance issue stuff. My brother's was awful and mine is awful as well. The more they try to work with you and assess the slower they make you go and the worse the balance until you feel a feather in the wind. Such an odd brain thing. To be more weight that ever I was at 140 or so, and still feeling lighter as I fly around on the buses as they start and stop. Eye things ADD to it as my right eye is wonky and my brain adjusting right and left is ridiculous to the extent my eye exams are always "Gee, your eyes are so much worse this year" and then a year later "Wow, so much better than last year!" Right! Aging is a nightmare and I've no courage for it.

Happy that the llamalover is back with us. Wishing need would show her face because I can't relax unless she does.

And on we go.
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Just got off the phone with mom , my 90 year old uncle is dieing. I've never been close to him. Dysfunctional family issues go way back in time.

Anyways mom acts shocked, I'm like this is what happens when you get up there, the body starts to shut down.

Why do some people even getting close to 89, with health issues, not accept death? Or want to believe that someday you will die. I don't get it. You would think the pain from a degenerative back would remind her.

Makes it harder on loved ones when someone won't accept it. Id say it's part of the control, control issue and a way to control people around them and so loved ones feel more pain?

Also makes me think mom is going to be one of those that linger .

Any ones opinion on this?
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Because we've constantly been handed this -

"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light." (Dylan Thomas)
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Hi, all! Hope everyone's well or at least muddling through. I'm back in school to tackle the 2nd half of my MS, and I have a feeling I'll be around the forum a little more. An uptick in stress always makes me appreciate this supportive site. Plus, AC gives me some means to share and discuss my thoughts -- however worthwhile or worthless they may be 😄-- about behavioral gerontology. My program often concentrates around best practices with ASD populations but I find a way to relate almost all of it to elders experiencing cognitive decline and their unique needs.

Golden, congrats on selling the house. That's a big step. I hope the specialists have some insight into what's causing R's dizziness.

Nacy, dying is the ultimate loss of control... if you think about it like that... makes some sense to me, somehow.

Llama, so glad you're home. (((hugs)))
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Anxiety
No matter how prepared we are. It’s still a shock.
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Alva: Thank you.
Ali: Thank you, also.
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Oh I'm sorry 97, I get that, I don't mean to sound insensitive, this is my dad's brother, mom has very little emotional feelings for.

My confusion is how someone nearing 90 doesn't except there own probably demise.

I'm sure it's partly aging brain and dementia, kind of like how demented people don't know there demented.

I just feel sorry for people that are not accepting.

I had a friend that smoked since she was 14 at 70 , the poor woman was just a mess dieing. Like complete shock, and I felt so bad for her family, she made it so much harder for them.

Aili I think your right, that makes a lot of sense actually!
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Anyways, I've pretty much figured out what's eating away at me about this subject. It's a manipulative control tactic of moms. Something just felt off about it all.
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Nacy,
You didn’t sound insensitive. I just happen to think people may know intellectually that death is near but emotionally, it is still a surprise, a shock, not expected. Soon perhaps but not today.
My DH aunt will be 98 in a few weeks. She could live a long long time or die tonight. If she passed tonight I will be shocked. She doesn’t have the type of health issues that many die from without wasting away. So she could live a long time. But my goodness 98. How could I be surprised. I have to laugh at myself. As odd as it might seem to say, I’m not ready.

I remember watching my parents when they received news of a death. A startled reaction is what comes to mind.

I think we are in denial about a lot of things. Like your friend who smoked. My SIL smokes. She has so many health problems and she still smokes. It’s like she must think she is exempt. Yet we do hear of people who get a diagnosis of a serious illness and they stop that day!

We know intellectually that we will die, sometimes we wish we would die such as in severe pain or misery but mostly I think it is, Nay, not today. after all if you woke up everyday for 90 yrs you would probably expect to wake up tomorrow too. And if not, if they expected to die any minute, then somebody on aging care would be saying, my mom is so annoying, she wakes up everyday and wonders why she is still here. 🤔🙄🤭
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