Joan Collins or Dolly Parton......hmmm. Either would do. In the ten-year follow-up story, the surviving Caring Daughter, now living in a cardboard box under a bridge, will give her name as Ginderella, claiming she was driven to alcoholism by GlamGran and her sad decline only TEN FEET AWAY IN HER ONCE ADORABLE TINY HOUSE. (ADU.) And not one of her ungrateful siblings would help change GlamGran's Glittery Depends.
Fawnby , burnt . I would rather blend into the wall than be all glittery . I wouldn’t wear one of those mother of the groom glittery gowns to my son’s wedding either . I wore a nice classic navy blue long dress .
It's a matter of personal taste and age with the glittering mother of the bride or groom dresses.
If my son gets married in the next few years and he just might to his girlfriend I could very easily wear a glittering, strapless mother-of-the-groom dress. I'm still hot with a nice body. So why not? I wouldn't do it when I'm 70 or something.
@Fawnby
I was cracking up about the Caring Daughter who now lives in a cardboard box. I was more or less thinking she now lives in a giant orthopedic shoe. I hope that cardboard box at least has some glitter on it so she can be living her best life as a member of the homeless community.
Go for it ! Of course we each do what we are comfortable with . I’m sure you will look great too! I admire glitter on others , just doesn’t look right on everyone, including me. My step mother in law wore strapless all over glitter for her son’s second marriage . By then she looked ridiculous in it at her age but that’s just my opinion . I’ve also always been trying not to get noticed anyway . My DH says I’ve been” trying to go through life anonymously “ since he met me . Lol. He says it’s my moms fault . He said she made me her servant . My mother even used to call me Cinderella sometimes because it’s close to my real name . 🙄 I asked my DH where his castle is .
I totally understand what you're saying. People should always be in good taste. When something does not look good anymore that's when it's time to try a different style.
My personal taste is that I always dressed tastefully. Nothing overdone or showing too much skin. That's just not me. I was never an attention seeker myself, but attention always found me. I hear you about mothers who try to make their daughters servants. Don't I know it. My mother has been jealous of me since about the day I was born. She was always mean and cruel about it too.
I've told her many times that I can't help that I got my father's looks. That if she wanted to reduce the risk of having gorgeous kids she should have had them with a less attractive man.
There are as many reasons for this as there are different family dynamics which a caregiver (who did not grow up with that parent) has not seen. It seems very sad of course when children don't have much time for their aging parents, and as an aging parent myself I miss my own children a lot, I get sad because don't get to see them enough so I get it. I do feel fortunate that my kids are loving and doing ok, but their jobs have moved them far away, they have families of their own, in-laws, etc and I understand what all that was like when my kids were little.
However, there are a few other reasons which come to mind in answer to your question of "Why children of older adults aren't as readily available for parents":
The older adult was/is abusive emotionally or physically toward their child and the child, for their own mental health cannot be around the parent. A subset of that is the older adult who was/is narcissistic and has always expected family members to wait on them, and to maintain their own sanity the family is now not willing to do that. This sadly seems to be very common.
Another possibility (depending on the family's culture) is of an American culture which encouraged and expected independence from family members. Parents expected their 18 year old children to move out of the home, take care of themselves and not ask for any help. In the last few decades that has become more difficult and many of those children are still struggling to make it, are exhausted already so don't have much time for anyone. Not everyone is financially able and having time for others can be a luxury. I speak from personal knowledge and experience - this is the culture I was raised in.
However, adults being in the "sandwich generation" may be the most common reason: these adult children are "sandwiched" between a multitude of commitments - meeting the needs of their own children, grandchildren, work and partner and any other commitment they have. It's not that the elderly loved one is less important, it is that the adult child is juggling so much they honestly don't have time and may even be neglecting their own personal health or needs. If you add any of the other factors like abusiveness or narcissistic behavior, the adult child is even less likely to want to have time. If they had a good relationship with their parent, they may make time to see them but it will still be somewhat limited. Many adult children have to work to age 70 or beyond, are not able to retire.
In addition, some adult children (like mine) may not live nearby and may be dealing with all of the previously mentioned factors that complicate visiting with their parent.
There was local man (95 or so) that just drove off in his classic car, into thick forrest, not found for about a week. Maybe not intentional so maybe upsetting for family.. Just him & his beloved car, in a natural setting - sounded ok to me.
I'm picturing Joan Collins when I think of a GlamGram.
Both styles tacky in their own ways .
It's a matter of personal taste and age with the glittering mother of the bride or groom dresses.
If my son gets married in the next few years and he just might to his girlfriend I could very easily wear a glittering, strapless mother-of-the-groom dress. I'm still hot with a nice body. So why not?
I wouldn't do it when I'm 70 or something.
@Fawnby
I was cracking up about the Caring Daughter who now lives in a cardboard box. I was more or less thinking she now lives in a giant orthopedic shoe.
I hope that cardboard box at least has some glitter on it so she can be living her best life as a member of the homeless community.
Go for it ! Of course we each do what we are comfortable with . I’m sure you will look great too! I admire glitter on others , just doesn’t look right on everyone, including me. My step mother in law wore strapless all over glitter for her son’s second marriage . By then she looked ridiculous in it at her age but that’s just my opinion . I’ve also always been trying not to get noticed anyway . My DH says I’ve been” trying to go through life anonymously “ since he met me . Lol. He says it’s my moms fault . He said she made me her servant . My mother even used to call me Cinderella sometimes because it’s close to my real name . 🙄 I asked my DH where his castle is .
I totally understand what you're saying. People should always be in good taste. When something does not look good anymore that's when it's time to try a different style.
My personal taste is that I always dressed tastefully. Nothing overdone or showing too much skin. That's just not me. I was never an attention seeker myself, but attention always found me.
I hear you about mothers who try to make their daughters servants. Don't I know it.
My mother has been jealous of me since about the day I was born. She was always mean and cruel about it too.
I've told her many times that I can't help that I got my father's looks. That if she wanted to reduce the risk of having gorgeous kids she should have had them with a less attractive man.
However, there are a few other reasons which come to mind in answer to your question of "Why children of older adults aren't as readily available for parents":
The older adult was/is abusive emotionally or physically toward their child and the child, for their own mental health cannot be around the parent. A subset of that is the older adult who was/is narcissistic and has always expected family members to wait on them, and to maintain their own sanity the family is now not willing to do that. This sadly seems to be very common.
Another possibility (depending on the family's culture) is of an American culture which encouraged and expected independence from family members. Parents expected their 18 year old children to move out of the home, take care of themselves and not ask for any help. In the last few decades that has become more difficult and many of those children are still struggling to make it, are exhausted already so don't have much time for anyone. Not everyone is financially able and having time for others can be a luxury. I speak from personal knowledge and experience - this is the culture I was raised in.
However, adults being in the "sandwich generation" may be the most common reason: these adult children are "sandwiched" between a multitude of commitments - meeting the needs of their own children, grandchildren, work and partner and any other commitment they have. It's not that the elderly loved one is less important, it is that the adult child is juggling so much they honestly don't have time and may even be neglecting their own personal health or needs. If you add any of the other factors like abusiveness or narcissistic behavior, the adult child is even less likely to want to have time. If they had a good relationship with their parent, they may make time to see them but it will still be somewhat limited. Many adult children have to work to age 70 or beyond, are not able to retire.
In addition, some adult children (like mine) may not live nearby and may be dealing with all of the previously mentioned factors that complicate visiting with their parent.
Mountains & whiskey.. fatal allergens!
There was local man (95 or so) that just drove off in his classic car, into thick forrest, not found for about a week. Maybe not intentional so maybe upsetting for family.. Just him & his beloved car, in a natural setting - sounded ok to me.
I like the classic car story . My son loves old cars .
My DH’s grandfather , ate a big Sunday dinner , then sat down in his recliner, smoked his favorite cigar and , fell asleep and that was that .