A little background. Mom is living in California. She is 89 years old. She has moderate to advance dementia. She wants to die in her home. She FIRMLY believes she is doing great and needs no help. She does not believe me or any of her friends or family, that she needs help. She has a strong routine that she follows. Her short-term memory is just about gone. It can last for several seconds. Last year, I took over her Trust when two doctors signed off on her dementia. Also, I pay her bills and taxes when she stopped paying for Medicare because it was free.
About three years ago, her doctor took her driving privileges away, and then I took her car keys away when she kept driving. That turn in a very nasty situation where she got physical with me. She hates her doctor and will never see him again. I would like to avoid that situation again.
Mom does have home assistance (M-F) for 4 to 6 hours. This person is wearing street clothing (not a uniform) Been trying to get coverage on the weekends but worker shortage. Mom believes this is her walking friend not a care giver.
Last weekend with the major rain storm, the power was off for about 30 hours. The police station is ½ block from mom’s house. Mom went to the police station 20 times in 10 hours on Saturday. In the past, mom goes to the police station for various reason. Saturday night the police called and they are ready to do a 5150 to the local hospital with APS. They also called her care giver too. They have our numbers on “speed-dial”. The police wanted a short-term plan of assisted care for 5 days, another storm is coming and they don’t need my mom coming in all the time. With all the urgent calls with the upcoming storm and more power outage.
In working with the current company and help from another company, we were able to get coverage that night, but next morning (Sunday) at the shift change. Mom had the daytime care giver leave the house. Mom’s neighbor and friend to help the situation but with no success. That care giver did not give up. She stayed in her car, and follow mom every time she left the house, 9X. 3 trips to the police station, one long walk, one trip to the store and rest trip were short trip to nowhere. The care giver met mom in the grocery store and mom was a very sweet lady. When the care giver walk mom back to her house (1 block away), mom turn nasty and had her leave.
I need advice on the 5150 and APS. Is better to have police call in the 5150 and take her to the hospital for evaluation and APS involved? Our should I choose a different path? Please share you thoughts.
Mom is not competent to make informed decisions so it is no longer what she wants, its what she needs.
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