After 4 years of caring, I absolutely know there is dementia going on with the parent, but it doesn’t fit the typical symptoms. Anybody else?

Hmmm. Dementia is defined as having certain cognitive issues along with the inability to perform several activities of daily living. I don't see that in your description. However, your LOs behavior deserves some evaluation. Dementia like symptoms (pseudodementia) can be caused by over 70 different issues. Some can be treated or even reversed. Her PCP can run tests that will detect some causes that can be treated and can refer her to other specialist if further evaluation is needed. Keep a log of her behavior so you know what to tell the dr.

I think you ARE describing some 'typical' dementia issues, frankly. Seeing things that aren't there (macrame curtains), dwelling/obsessing about things or other people (the lady next door), sleep disturbances (sitting up all night)......not sure about the hair-do changes, she'd have to be dying her hair and getting it cut herself to have such a drastic change, right?

In any event, your mom needs a proper dementia evaluation by her doctor in order to stop guessing and know the truth. If she's unwilling to be tested, then I can say I DO think you're right............mom is definitely exhibiting signs of dementia, based on what I've seen with my own mother and other family members who have been formally diagnosed.

I'd discuss it with her doctor. Normally, they will rule out other reasons for something that is unusual, such as UTI, medication interaction or some other illness. The doctor can also do an office evaluation for cognitive decline. That involves evaluating a number of things that you may not have had the opportunity to see lately. But, I'd report what you have observed.

I'm no expert, but, from what I've read and seen it is common to see things like delusions, hallucinations, and sleep disorder with people who have dementia. My LO would report things to me and ask me if they were real. Sometimes, she would tell me things seem to be like a dream to her. She also had times she slept too much and times she could not sleep, for which medication helped.

I'd get her checked out to make sure of what's going on.

Is this lady living alone? Are you on good terms with her and her family? If so, I should just open up opportunities for them to tell you how things are going; then, if it seems appropriate, you can pass on tips about what to look out for.

Is it possible that mother is seeing a reflection of herself or of a picture, reflected in the window glass? Glass can act as a mirror with black night outside.