I'm 24 and now live with my mom, 2 kids, brother and dad, but I'm the only one doing anything around here. I guess I just wanna vent, its so hard watching my mom be in constant pain but also having to do everything for her and everyone else in my house is driving me mad, I don't wanna cry in front of anyone because I'm the strong one. I was a drug addict and I left it all behind to do this because love is stronger thabn any addiction. Bit its emotionally destroying me. I just wish I had help.
Your brothers must be old enough to help to some degree but if they haven't been trained to help it's probably going to be hard to make them. I wouldn't do things for them that they can do for themselves.
If your dad is healthy, he should also be helping. It sounds as if you are being taken advantage of since your are the "girl." Also, if you are living rent free, your dad may feel that you "owe" them.
Try to have a family meeting of some type to see if you can get them to understand that everyone pulling together will make it better for the whole family.
You may want to seek the help of a family counseling service for more support. Many are free or use a sliding scale.
Good luck, Brianna. You are strong. We all need the support of others. Please let us know how you are doing.
Carol
It is only natural that people only do what they must. But you are too young for this. Sit your family members down and let them know that work must be shared. Make a list--a real list of the true amount of work--it will surprise them! Then, ask for help in sharing the load.
And get out to meetings!!!!! You can't imagine how it will help. There are others in the rooms who are in your situation. Meet people; go for coffee! I go to a meeting every day! I am not in good shape if I start missing. Honestly!
Big hug!!!!!
If the assigned chores are undone, stop cooking for them. Just cook for Mom, then you and the kids,(only your kids) go out for McD's on the night that everything ends up undone and something is gonna happen. Maybe they will take Dad out for dinner? Uh oh, did you forget to write down two days a week when it is: "You're on your own night."????
There are so many in your household, it just happens that way when there is no leader. Hire a housekeeper also, everyone pays. You don't have to do it all yourself, but someone has to organize everyone else. Then rotate chores. Is there a technical person who can draw up a flow-chart? Everyone does make their own bed, right? Otherwise, kick them to the curb.
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