Apathetic Siblings; After Mom passes, what are the legalities of them coming for her stuff?

What is the value of "those things" that you mention? Can any of "those things" be sold now so that she can contribute money toward her living expenses?

First thing I have to say, neither you nor your brothers are responsible for providing any financial support to your mother. Nor are you required to provide any other support to her, care giving, housing etc.

What happens to your mother's stuff should be determined by her Will. You do no state in your profile that Mum has dementia, so there should not be any reason for her not to have a Will.

What sort of stuff are you talking about? Anything of value? Do you want it, or do you just not want your brothers to have it?

If she is able you should have her do a will. It need not be complicated, Google the laws for your state regarding wills and draw it up.

If your mom is not receiving any income you should contact your local area on aging and get some information on what assistance is available to her.

Personally I think that you should get whatever you want of hers and let them fight over the rest.

By law they can not come into your home and remove anything. If they show up, you don't even have to open the door. If they get ugly, call 911 and let the law explain that they have no rights to enter your home and remove items.

You don't have to be there doormat when your mom passes.

I feel so badly about this situation. The thought of you having provided care all that time and having sibs show up upon death to pick up what they believe is "theirs" and they will act like nothing's wrong. The statement "Mom always wanted me to have it" should be stricken from our language in my opinion - unless it's in writing. I know a lady who put a tag on her personal effects so everyone would know who it was supposed to go to after she died. I assume there were written instructions as well, but I don't know. Something fairly simple like that might be all you need, but please find out for sure because it can get ugly. In another family, after a parent's death, cheap-ish piece of furniture was being fought over by 2 siblings and the furniture is now stored in the home of a 3rd party as that was deemed to be the best option in the moment. Far as I know, no one has contacted 3rd party with any serious plan to come get it. And, in this case, I'd assume the 3rd party has rights as well since it's now been years of free storage. Seems needlessly complicated. Anyway, after all that drama and hard feelings - no one is even enjoying the piece of furniture right now. I think the two seeking it didn't truly want it - they just didn't want the other to have it. Seems avoidable. I do think it might be fairly simple for you to get things in order.

I think you explain it to them as you just did to us. Tell them that you bear them no grudges going forward but that honestly, they provided almost nothing to her support. IF your Mom doesn't have a will or Trust that names you heir to her things, excluding the others (simple statements as to why can be created in the document) that should be done if your Mom is competent to do that. I would imagine she does get Social Security? And that should be used to her living expenses. I think you would benefit from now seeing a laywer for an hour of advice, one who deals with elder law. And of course you would think of these things. We all do. Everyone knows within where some of this is going, and tries to line the ducks up in a row. Now if she leaves nothing, you should be ready to have them descend and just say no re what she left. If she leaves money and there is no will you need to be ready to get yourself made executor of the estate, which would be easy if you have a lawyer at the ready to file that, given how long your Mom has been with you. But sure easier to do now if you are able.

She gets no Social Security?

My opinion, my house. They just can't walk in. If stuff was accumulated while she was living there and you paid for it, your stuff.

I would say Mom has no Will because she doesn't have any assets. If she does, you should have been using them for her care. Have her write up a paper, designating who she wants to get what. If there is a Will then this would be a Codicil. Have is signed and notarized. This should help with any problems later. She could stipulate that as the one who has cared for her, you receive all her possessions .

Don't know if there would be any restrictions on brothers taking any of her assets, her will would determine that.