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His ex wife will get her half of retirement. The nursing home gets some. I was told I will have very little to live on. Does the nursing home take our savings and checking too?

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My father was left with all money in checking and savings, neither had a huge balance but a good cushion, when my mother required Medicaid in a nursing home. He had to sell one car, kept his entire SS and pension. My mother’s SS went to the nursing home. My dad’s financial picture changed very little
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The nursing home will not take half of whatever is in a savings or checking account. They are not entitled to the half that belongs to the spouse who's going into the nursing home. Only half though. When the person in the nursing home goes on Medicaid, which unless people are millionaires always happens, Medicaid will want to know if you and your spouse own property (real estate, cars, etc...). If the property is jointly owned by both spouses, they may want half of its value. If a spouse is still living in the home, Medicaid will let them stay in the home. If the home then gets sold, they can come looking for half of the proceeds that belong to the person in the nursing home. The spouse not in the nursing home can usually keep a car too under Medicaid's rules.
Don't listen to a single word of what the nursing home tells you about how Medicaid works. The business end of all nursing homes will pull every dirty trick in the book to intimidate and scare a person into liquidating every asset they have and handing over to them on a silver platter. You don't have to do that.
Do not allow the nursing home to have ANY of your banking information. Insist that they send you a bill every month and then pay them with a cashier's check from the bank until your husband goes on Medicaid. If they have access to your banking information they can do anything they want and they'll get away with it.
Your husband and your monthly income may be low enough that he will qualify for Medicaid without you having to pay cash to the nursing home. Medicaid considers if there is a spouse and the income is their only source of support. A nursing home will make no such considerations and they don't care if you're left in the street. Talk to your state's Department of Social Services about Medicaid and what your husband may qualify for before you give one dime to the nursing home. It would be good if you spoke to a lawyer who specializes in elder law and estate planning too. They will help you.
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jacobsonbob Feb 2021
People are in nursing homes for varying lengths of time. Some people may not have extensive financial resources and pay either privately or through insurance for a short time, but if the spouse or parent doesn't live very long after admission, there may never be a need for Medicaid to "kick in".
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You will be allowed to keep a percentage of your assets (which includes the checking and savings account). The money in the accounts doesn’t necessarily have to be split, as community spouse you can keep almost $130k in exempt assets. If your income is less than $2,114 a month then you can keep part of your husbands income. But if your income is over that, then all of your husbands income will go to the nursing home.
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Nancy, check with an elder care lawyer. They can go over everything in great detail about this, You will not be left destitute.
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I guess its in the divorce papers she gets half of his pension?

The NH does not "take" anything. What happens if DH needs Medicaid is you become a Community Spouse. You can remain in the home and have car. Your savings will be split with DHs share going to pay for his care. When its almost gone, u then file for Medicaid. Not sure how your monthly income will be split but you will not be impoverished.

I suggest you consult with a lawyer well versed in Medicaid. He can advise u on when it would be a good time to split ur assets.
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againx100 Feb 2021
No offense, JoAnn, but how do you know she will not be impoverished? If half their income will go to her husband's stay at the NH, well, that could make the financial situation difficult to impossible. I wonder how that works in most situations where one spouse has to go into a NH. I wonder if the spouse remaining home is left dealing with serious financial woes? Say, they're both getting social security. I assume his would now go to the nursing home to help pay for his bill there. I've even wondered this about when a spouse dies and you go from 2 soc sec checks down to 1. Gotta be tough on a lot of people.
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Sine your case is complicated, please get advice from a lawyer that specializes either in family law or elder law.
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Imho, perhaps it will assist you to retain an elder law attorney.
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Parkinsons getting worse, need help, ideas for getting up steep, icy driveway to get to care van ride to medical appts asap. Med tests, procedures needed.
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Midkid58 Feb 2021
Kathi--
Start a whole new post, this one is dedciated to helping Nancy. You'll get a lot more answers if you begin your own thread.
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You really need to talk to an elder care attorney. There are a couple of points...one, if the ex-wife gets the retirement assets in the will, they might not be protected before then. They might be considered assets by Medicare. Also, some people must get “Medicare divorces” where they divorce, which forces a division of assets immediately. Then, the part you receive is yours to keep. Every state has different laws for how assets are divided and it can be very expensive to figure this out by yourself. Much better to hire an attorney, which might not cost as much as you think, to be sure you are doing everything right.
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What the exwife gets was decided in a divorce. Has nothing to do with his current situation. He gets X amount of money for retirement, X amount for social security. The household income will be considered and some will be considered for the wife who remains in the home. Same for the savings and checking. It is referred to as spousal impoverishment - they don't want to leave the person remaining in the home without money. Depending on how much is counted towards hubby will be the amount that has to be spent down before state Medicaid pays for the bed, or, if he has enough money he might be self pay.

Call the local medicaid (for elderly) office and talk to a caseworker there. Usually these offices/staff are located where they process Food Stamp application. They can explain how the monies are counted toward him and when you should be applying for the medicaid bed/assistance. There is a good chance there is an online calculator to give you information of programs he might be eligible for.
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