I'm a caretaker of 96 years old with mixed dementia. 24/7 on duty. Today is the 18th day. I really want to tell this to "her" family that i cant take care of their loves one with that working hours. But I want to make sure fisrt that its reasonable. I mean, are there any of you that have a same experience and you can handle it?
You will need to stand firm on this one and I understand financially how it maybe difficult for you to do so but I beg of you please consider this: Right now you may need the money but that isnt going to change any time soon unless you marry a very rich man of course. So you will need to earn in the future and you have been trained as a nurse. What type of job will you get if your referee says you let his mother fall/failed to give her the right meds/allowed her to get bed sores (they wont remember that you were past the exhaustion stage when they write trust me) Far better to get out or make a stand on her behalf and get the right care for her - good luck hun - travel? where to? who's accompanying you? you cannot manage person AND baggage alone if she is vulnerable
I was a caregiver for 13 - 16 hours per day, for 196 days straight.
I have been in the hospital 20 plus days, it has cost me far more than I ever made, and I almost did not come out of it, then got a superbug from the hospital,
Advice, 24 hours a day is NOT sustainable. 3 days on 4 days off or 4 days on, 3 days off, but NO NO NO.
Please do not do what I did. I am the only one she knows and will have, do not get in that trap. It is better to tell whomever up front.
Really, I lost 50 lbs and still work, but am so exhausted, that I only do 6 hours of elder care now, and work with the Household that has been so very good to me.
Pleese read everyone's advice.
Cwillie, labor laws yes, but in the state that I live in and I am on the books all the time, as caregivers do not realize or some don't that it just is a no win for you to make money off the books, no social security, no labor laws. And by the way, i just found out, when my doctor wrote a note that I was to work from 10:00 not 9:00am, that because I was an employee of one, they did not need to follow the labor laws.
Be GOOD TO YOURSELF, NO ONE ELSE WILL. {LIFE IS A JOURNEY, NOT A RACE"
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The recommeded working week in Europe is 48 hours and we actually have a directive that says you must not exceed that. The reason we have that directive is down straightforwardly to accidents and general health and safety.
You MUST document what you do and then consider what YOUR recommendations would be to this family using your SKILLS as a graduate. that recommendation should include a risk assessment of the carers too.
If for example you are too exhausted to care what are the risk to the person you care for
Failure to give the right meds or watch that they are indeed taken
Failure to ensure you monitor her fluid intake and urine output
Failure to manage her walking etc
It is usual in some case for their to be two carers - not ideal but it does happen - 3 would be far better 4 would be the right number. If the night carers are allowed to sleep and not do waking care then they get paid less - so they do 10-6 or if just 2 carers 8-8 but only 5 days a week not 7
Day carers get a higher rate because their job is more strenuous.
I would personally note all that I do and note how much time it take to od it. This family dont sound as though they have a clue as to what is involved in GOOD care and perhaps they need an awakening - it is worth a try before you find other employment where the employer is so unfair.
Ayucan, this family hired you for your graduate-level understanding of their mother's needs, right? So you owe it to them to explain what those needs are: never mind what local labour laws are, this lady's care requires much, much more than one exhausted, stressed out person can give. What about downloading some information sheets for them to back up what you're explaining? The fact that they hired you, a graduate, rather than somebody less qualified shows that they do want to do the right thing; so with any luck you'll be able to educate them. Best of luck, let us know how it's going.
Ayucan, you need to find another line of work - this is never going to work for you as a household employee.
Get someone to train you for your duties. Ask lots of questions.
Know your limitations, and please dont put the patient in danger by what you dont know about caregiving. You can learn, but is this the right patient for your first assignment?
With supervision and more experience, you can better use your bachelor of nursing in another setting, such as a hospital.
That is not to say you are not qualified for (nanny sitter), but instead are without experience, and over qualified for this particular assignment.
You can, get specific training for the duties required of you on this job.
We have the same situation, where Mom gets up several times at night to toilet. We got a baby monitor so that we can hear and see what is going on. It really helps. Because she doesn't think to turn on the bathroom light anymore and just relies on the numerous night lights, we installed a motion detecting light switch that will also turn itself off after an adjustable number of minutes.