My mom has dementia and Parkinson's-currently in a Dementia care facility with 23 other residents. She is failing daily-but my concern is she is always telling me about people that pick her up like a baby and throw her into bed. I know that her mind is not really understanding things but I feel like I should be concerned. The staff there as so many other places in not really that great. The place is spot less and well maintained. My Mom is also under Hospice care. I guess I am asking should I be really worried and investigate what she tells me. I go up daily and at different times I have never seen any of the staff pushing or abusing any of the residents. She has been there since March.
I recall picking up my kids and grandchildren and playfully tossing them on the couch or bed and this was a fun game. (I hate now to think that 70 years from now they my think of this as frightening)
If this becomes scary for her ask the Hospice nurse about medication.
Medication with Parkinson's can be tricky though.
Also ask the staff how they get her into bed. Is it possible that they are using a Hoyer Lift and to your Mom it feels like they are "picking her up and tossing her onto the bed"? You might even want to visit some evening and watch the procedure.
Also keep in mind aging, thinning skin bruises easily and not to jump to conclusions if you do see a bruise.
Trust me there were times when giving my husband a shower I would look at his arm and wonder how he got the bruise or on his leg. (Most times it was just a bump against the kitchen table)
Using a Hoyer sling sometimes would leave a red welt for 30 minutes or so. With poor circulation welts go away slowly.
So seeing a bruise one should not automatically think abuse. But if it does occur often that might warrant a closer look, not just for abuse but if there is a problem with transfer they may need to change how it is being done.
Pick her up like a baby and throw her into bed sounds a little improbable; but what's not at all unlikely is that it's an exaggeration or embroidering of what really happens, and as BB says your mother's perception of how she is being treated does matter.
What also matters is that the staff have been properly trained in manual handling. If they're having to make such strenuous efforts to assist your mother into bed that she feels as if she's being mauled about, they're not doing it right. So yes, do raise this as an issue - observe a few transfers yourself, if possible - because it's a risk for your mother and it's not great for the staff's wellbeing, either.
I would talk to the social worker about mom's perception and also what steps they are taking to prevent her falls.
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