My divorced brother took care of my mom for about a year after she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease, but had lived with her in HER house for more than 12 yrs. When he couldn't take care of her anymore, my divorced-with-no-kids sister told us she couldn't care for her either. I'm the youngest, with an elderly husband and 2 girls in college and took her in. It's really an honor to care for my mom, whom I love, and I don't complain. My husband, youngest daughter and a hired lady help with her care. We take turns. Our life is certainly not what it used to be, and we make sacrifices. The problem is that I don't get much help from my siblings. My brother doesn't pay rent living in my mom's house, and my sister is so much in debt that sometimes sends a few dollars. My sister is the oldest and she has Power of Attorney rights in mom's will. She has reminded me that she will decide any matters about my mom's care when she needs to go to a home, because she is " the oldest". But because I'm the caregiver, and have gotten all the help my mom needs until now, do I automatically become my mom's legal guardian with future decisions? And if I do, does that make my sister's POA rights in the will null? I live in Texas. What are my rights? Thanks.
Check out this AgingCare.com Article:
How to Get Guardianship of an Elderly Parent
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-get-guardianship-of-elderly-parents-140693.htm
Hope this helps!
First of all POA, power of attorney, ceases upon the person's death, so it has nothing to do with a will. A will is not the way to establish who has POA. So I'm not sure what your sister has, but if it is in a wll it is not POA. Is she perhaps the executor? That would have nothing to do with decision while your mother is living.
Also, no, you do not automatically become your mom's legal guardian able to make future decisions just because you have been taking care of her.
And your sister does not automatically get to make decisions about care placement because she is oldest.
What is your mother's current mental status? A person can have dementia and still be able to make certain kinds of legal decisions, depending on their cognitive ability.
If your mother does not have enough money for her own care, there are a number of programs she might qualify for. The elder law attorney can help with that, too. Is your mother on Medicaid?
Unfortunately, the situation is too complicated for a do-it-yourself approach. You really do need to consult with a professional to ensure that your mother's best interests are being served and will continue to be served well as her needs increase. Maybe this professional will advice you to pursue guardianship, but it is possible that simpler solutions are available. Do you have a copy of the will? Do you know where it is filed? I think the elder law attorney may need to see it. Are you aware of any other legal documents that exist, such as a health care directive, living will, POA assignment, etc?