My husband is retiring and we want to sell our home and move. My 89 year old mom has lived with me for over a year. Not at all a fun year for me. I’ve gained 12 pounds and I’m never really happy. But I’m it for my mom besides all my daughters and grandkids and I am deeply controlled my guilt. Honestly I really don’t like her. I feel bad sometimes cuz she’s old.
Does she have physical or mental disabilities?
You're not doing her any favor to live with her, being controlled by guilt. If you're not happy, it will show.
Check out the senior options in your town (if she likes the area).
You can tell her you're downsizing or moving out of the area. Chances are she will want to stay in the area she's been living in and hopefully not want to go with you.
You'll need to get her settled before you move. Start looking now.