Give yourself time. It's only been a couple of weeks.
My healing didn't start for weeks after my mother's death, because the memorial service wasn't until a month later, and nothing starts to feel normal until all that is over and everything that goes with it. In fact, my mother died in July 2021 (Dad died in 2018), and as I only wrapped up my parents' estate last week, only now do my mom and dad occupy a different place in my heart. I'm no longer a POA, a Trustee, or a caregiver, and once again they're my much-loved parents.
If you were doing hands-on care for a long time, then you may feel a little bit of Empty Nest Syndrome. I know I had some of the same feeling I had when my youngest went off to college -- I was unemployed, so to speak.
Grief is a time of enormous adjustment and becoming accustomed to an empty space. You will adapt in time, but give yourself that time.
I recommend the book Healing After Loss, by Martha Hickman. It's a year's worth of short essays on grief, and you only read one page a day so it isn't too much to absorb.
So sorry , Others have said wonderful things already . I would just add that grief counseling or support group can be helpful as well if you think you would like to talk .
So sorry you lost your mom. My mom died 6 months ago today. The first few weeks I was almost frozen. I suppose it was exhaustion. My mom also died very fast. Much faster than hospice, or her doctor predicted. I was not ready for her to leave so soon. I have good days and bad still. Days that I can hardly deal with it and days it is not on my mind. But, time is a healer. I do not think sadness will ever go completely away but I am learning to roll through it when it happens. Be good to yourself. You will smile again,
Dear Wreckof64 Your heart will make room for your grief as time goes by and as funkygrandma said, you will always grieve mom. In time it will be absorbed as a part of your life and not consume all of your life. Right now that may be hard to believe. You had her on your mind 24/7 as her care was your focus. Your job is done now. Mom is no longer vulnerable to the vicissitudes of old age. Now is the time for you to rest and to heal. The body can revive long before the heart. So be patient with yourself. Be with your pain. Mom was important to you. She is worthy of your grief. Your feelings are valuable. Be with your feelings and know that as time passes, this scar on your psyche will still be with you, but you will be able to touch it without the rawness you are experiencing now in these early days. Big hugs for you and your family.
Grief painful or dull will be with you for a long time, perhaps the rest of your life. You have not only lost mom but your role as a caregiver. So that is actually 2 losses that you are experiencing. Give yourself time to grieve. Give yourself time to find out what your "new normal" is.
2 quotes that I keep by my desk. Grief never ends But it changes It's a passage, not a place to stay Grief is not a sign of weakness nor a lack of faith. It is the price of love.
Crying is a way your eyes speak when your mouth cant explain how broken your heart is.
You will be "coping with grief" for a very long time if not forever. Your mothers passing is very new, so allow yourself time to grieve the mother you loved and cared for. It will get easier in time, but for now honor your mother by allowing yourself to grieve.
My healing didn't start for weeks after my mother's death, because the memorial service wasn't until a month later, and nothing starts to feel normal until all that is over and everything that goes with it. In fact, my mother died in July 2021 (Dad died in 2018), and as I only wrapped up my parents' estate last week, only now do my mom and dad occupy a different place in my heart. I'm no longer a POA, a Trustee, or a caregiver, and once again they're my much-loved parents.
If you were doing hands-on care for a long time, then you may feel a little bit of Empty Nest Syndrome. I know I had some of the same feeling I had when my youngest went off to college -- I was unemployed, so to speak.
Grief is a time of enormous adjustment and becoming accustomed to an empty space. You will adapt in time, but give yourself that time.
I recommend the book Healing After Loss, by Martha Hickman. It's a year's worth of short essays on grief, and you only read one page a day so it isn't too much to absorb.
Ive already accepted that it’s always gonna hurt.
Your heart will make room for your grief as time goes by and as funkygrandma said, you will always grieve mom.
In time it will be absorbed as a part of your life and not consume all of your life. Right now that may be hard to believe. You had her on your mind 24/7 as her care was your focus. Your job is done now. Mom is no longer vulnerable to the vicissitudes of old age. Now is the time for you to rest and to heal. The body can revive long before the heart. So be patient with yourself. Be with your pain. Mom was important to you. She is worthy of your grief. Your feelings are valuable. Be with your feelings and know that as time passes, this scar on your psyche will still be with you, but you will be able to touch it without the rawness you are experiencing now in these early days.
Big hugs for you and your family.
You have not only lost mom but your role as a caregiver. So that is actually 2 losses that you are experiencing.
Give yourself time to grieve.
Give yourself time to find out what your "new normal" is.
2 quotes that I keep by my desk.
Grief never ends
But it changes
It's a passage, not a place to stay
Grief is not a sign of weakness
nor a lack of faith.
It is the price of love.
Crying is a way your eyes speak
when your mouth cant explain
how broken your heart is.
take care of yourself. and your sister
It will get easier in time, but for now honor your mother by allowing yourself to grieve.
Grief is normal. Allow yourself time to heal and adjust to life without your mom.