After 55 years of marriage he lost my MOm 10 years ago. Never looked at another woman till a year ago he was introduced to an older woman "just for lunch companion". Within 4 lunch dates they were engaged. She broke it off abruptly but since then he has made some very inappropriate comments to women (waitresses, etc). Not like him at all...I think he's losing his "filter", otherwise mentally fit. What do I do?
Do you have any idea why the woman he was engaged to broke it off so quickly?
Again, I think it would be worth mentioning it to his doctor and watching to see f any other aberrations show up. Yes, sex is good at any age, but inappropriate behaviour isn't. I guess I am saying that I am supportive of your concern.
If I called him on it later, he'd just shrug it off. Mentally he was all there (died at 92), but I think his brain might have done a bit of changing. I think the filters come off with some people as they age. But have you talked to you dad about his comments and what does he say if you have? If not, tell him how inappropriate his comments are.
ff - I can't agree it is the nature of all men to make comments that would embarrass their daughter. I worked for any years, and there were a only a few men in the workplace whose behaviour was offensive. In general, they were not. You, yourself state you were very uncomfortable with the older man who called you good looking and that is pretty mild. I believe that holysmokes is talking about things more offensive than that.
Anything that makes another person uncomfortable can be considered harassment - " any unwanted physical or verbal behaviour that offends or humiliates you."
holysmokes - are these young women indicating that your dad's behaviour is making them uncomfortable? You wrote about his comments, "But he says the things to the woman, not a chauvinist but asexual in nature. ..i can't imagine this was ever acceptable"
Did you mean sexual not asexual?
I think it is worth mentioning to his doctor.
Last month while attending a funeral service, one of my boss's buddies [guess he's in his late 70's] came up behind me, put his hands on my shoulder's and said "hey, good looking".... he was an economist, speaks half dozen languages, world traveler. I wanted to be invisible at that moment.
My boss [79] is a recent widower... oh my gosh, the older single/widow women are coming out of woodwork. If one is in the office visiting, I can overhear her *flirting*, too, and sometimes there are those play on words.