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My father 87 has been in the hospital, rehab, hospital and home for the last three months. He has gone from being a fully vital person to being completely bed bound. He has an infection that is not budging and more concerning he is not interested in fighting any more. He doesn't want to eat and doesn't want to try to stand up. I don't know what to do, it has been incredible difficult to watch. I am trying my best to be as positive as I can but I think even that is upsetting to him. My mother always negative, a trooper although incredibly strong with caregiving is really not helpful with the emotional aspect. He just wants to be left alone in the bed which of course is the worst, bedsores and completely diminished body no muscle left anymore. I am doing this alone and not sure which way to turn next and advise is appreciated.

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I did but the had to put him in the hospital - am afraid to call to is morning
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He's probably ready to go. Being completely bedbound, is truthfully very little to no life. I'm sorry.
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Cascia Jun 2020
I know thank you
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It is utterly impossible for us to understand, but people DO give up and they do honestly just wish to "go." My Dad reached that point and told me he was only just tired; wanted so badly to go. Attempted to make himself get up for my Mom. Please call in hospice, give him the right to go now, and make his exit as comfortable for him as you are able. He is done with this life. He is tired. It is too hard and too painful. And for what? It is now only the loss and loss and more loss or mobility, of ability, of dignity. There is little of joy in it. As a nurse I have come to believe that many many of us find the end absolutely dreadful, and that it goes on way too long for many of us. I am so sorry. Your Dad is "turning his face to the wall". This is an ancient expression, around way before the 16th century. Some people disengage, even with those they love most, and long only for rest and peace.
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Cascia Jun 2020
thank you I had made the decision yesterday for home hospice but then he had a fever and put him in the hospital again - I hope he's not there too long - had to accept - his body is giving up and that he's giving up the fight
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It sounds like it is his time to go home. Call hospice for some support.
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