I must look like the crazy spouse who does not understand. I feel that our little children and his grandkids from is older kids should have somwhere in his life. No balance . Chronicly ill, but no where near end of life, his parents take 24 hr/ 7 days a week every day. My husband has stopped working and moved to sleep on the couch at the tiny apartment rather than use adult daycare/ HHA or a 24 care home.
I'm just asking for some work and time with our kids ( 2 little ones in elementaly school) Seems like this could cause a divorce with most people...
What he is doing is not healthy in any way. Have you talked to him about it in a calm, direct way?
Perhaps some counseling is in order. He is missing out on his life with his family. No good can come from it especially when you used the word "divorce" in your post. I hope you can convince him to talk with someone who will give him a little perspective.
good luck