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Imho, I fail to understand elder mentality, e.g. my own mother would not use her walker "because it made her look old." Huh? She was 94 years of age! She also possessed a Life Alert pendant, but didn't wear it in the shower "because she didn't want it to get wet." Huh? The company said YOU MUST WEAR IT WHILE SHOWERING. Then she would think that a meal out at a non fast food restaurant for two people should cost $12. Prayers sent.
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XenaJada Dec 2020
Oh yes! I've seen/heard those same comments from multiple elderly relatives. My aunt (now deceased) was in BAD SHAPE, could barely walk, when her daughter died of cancer. When we were leaving her house for the funeral, she saw me loading her walker and THREW A SCREAMING FIT (misplaced anger, I get it), saying "I am NOT walking into that church with a walker!" I told her that was fine, I was taking it for the graveside, which required traversing a sloping, grassy, lumpy area. She doubled down on the hissie fit. Turned out to be hot as heck at the cemetery and she was EXHAUSTED and announced she was unable to get back to the car. Guess what. I was on the sidelines with her trusty walker I had carried to the graveside service. She used it.
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I had to laugh, I am 86, Hubby will be 89 in January. I held the ladder and helped him put up the Christmas lights today. We have always done it, don't know about next year. Don't know who we could hire and all the neighbors have their lights up. We looked weird being the only dark house in the neighborhood. We get up on ladders all the time. I feel safer with the ladder than I do a kitchen step stool. I won't get on it most of the time.
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XenaJada Dec 2020
Have you seen the laser light machine that you set up in your yard and it projects Christmas images onto your house? BEST THING EVER!
We have one that changes and has little snowmen, christmas trees, and snowflakes moving around on our garage doors facing the street. We also have a simple lighted garland and wreath on our front door and a small 3 ft. tree on a table in our LR.
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I'm just going to weigh in on the hoarding. It IS a mental illness that can get a lot worse as the person ages. (See Diogenes syndrome.) It can be caused by trauma, depression, OCD, etc. Some people hoard because of needing a feeling of control or to fill a need. If you have the time (which you probably don't if you're dealing with this), you may want to check out the Adult Children of Hoarders group on Facebook. It has really helped me to understand a lot of issues that plagued my now-deceased hoarder mother/enabler father. (Clearing out her absolutely packed four-bedroom house/two car garage, crawl space and attic was the hardest thing I ever did!) Some adult children are very bitter and hostile to their hoarder parents because there can be a strong trait of narcissism in some hoarders, but there are a lot of adult children who do love and want to care for their parents. Just throwing that out as a resource as most adult children of hoarders at some point have to clean out the hoard (or deny the inheritance). It's always a big chore or a big decision. Good luck. PM me if you have questions about that issue. I'm sorry I'm not a big help on the dementia issues since I'm learning and in process on that for my MIL.
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