Elderly people with urinary incontinence and retention. Any suggestions?

dear OP,

hug :).

i have a friend whose father went through urinary retention. saw urologist. got a suprapubic catheter (that means not only is it a catheter, but it’s permanent. little hole/operation in stomach). the advantage to the permanent one is that it’s in the stomach. normal catheters are inserted in the private parts, which can cause pain when you sit for hours in a chair, or wheelchair. both normal and permanent catheters are equally prone to UTIs.

so, disadvantage of catheters:
you’ll get more UTIs.
(by the way, small UTIs can easily be treated with drinking lots of water) (water also helps prevent UTIs)
(medium UTIs need antibiotics) (severe UTIs need hospital treatment, to prevent sepsis)

(mannny UTIs can be treated by just drinking lots of water. it’ll pass).

advantage of catheters:
you no longer need to think about pipi. it just automatically goes in the pipi bag. or into the valve (if you manually open the valve, for example for the suprapubic catheter).

you no longer need to go to the bathroom many times. during the night for example, with the pipi bag, you don’t need to go to the bathroom at all for pipi. my friend’s father sleeps very well at night now, every night. uninterrupted sleep.

My mom got discharged from her final hospital stay with a catheter after retaining 750 ml and just not being able to go. She's had it for over 3 weeks it's a blessing in disquise and yes the nurse said almost everyone with a catheter has a UTI but she doesn't complain of any pain. Since she is so hard to move or position it is def for the best that she has this vs having to change her "brief" ( that word instead of diaper irritates me, the dignity part is out the window she has no modesty left, but it doesn't change the fact that my parent is going to the bathroom in their pants ;( She can't feel when she's having a BM either and it's actually been over 2 weeks since her last one!! Her nurse had me give her lax finally today... but she didn't seem too suprised or concerned. I am it's toxins just sitting in her poisioning her :(

I would ask her doctor about this. Something is keeping her from peeing until she is asleep and relaxed.

Here is a post on this very subject from 2019/2020:

https://www.agingcare.com/questions/purewick-external-catheter-leakage-451606.htm

Here is a link to Amazon reviews of the Purewick system from verified buyers:

https://www.amazon.com/Bard-Medical-Purewick-External-Catheter/product-reviews/B07Y42RD9T

Good luck to you