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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I think that takes a lot of nerve, asking you to give up your job and home when you're not even his heir. I don't think I'd want to care for anyone who exhibits that degree of entitlement, or who seems to have so little regard for your needs or your future.
He can leave his money to whomever he wants. But you don't need to give up your life for him either. In your place, I'd just say no.
I so agree. The likelihood of being able to care for a senior until death in the home isn't great. And that "inheritance"may be dwindled down to zero in the end. If someone is quitting a job to do this care they should be paid, have the care contract done with an attorney, and report the pay as income
Two separate subject here. First of all, who your father is leaving his estate to is irrelevant. It's his own choice. Second, he need not discuss end of life plans with anyone. He can make his own decisions until he is unable, and at that time the doctors will contact the POA for health care he has chosen or his next of kin (in that order).
As to taking on 24/7 care of a senior, why do you think you might like to do that? Are you ready to give up your job? Is your father ready and willing to pay you the going rate for 24/7 care? (If so do the care plan with an attorney). We see often on Forum that those who wish to leave their jobs, move in with elders and give 24/7 care end up homeless and jobless and without a job history often enough. Ultimately, however, whether you take on 24/7 care of your Dad or do not is entirely up to you.
You might explain to him that b/c you have no inheritance, it's critical for you to continue working, outside of the home. Are you sure that you're more or less disinherited? If so, you could add that it might be appropriate for him to ask the individual(s) who will be inheriting from him.
You don't share what your father's health issues are, but leaving one's job and home to care for anyone is usually not a very wise thing to do. What will you do for money? Will he pay you(as he should)? Are you ready to give up your life for your father? Are you equipped to provide the care that he needs now and down the road? These are all questions that you need to ask yourself, before making any drastic decisions. Your father has many options to get the care he needs,(that don't include you) including home health agencies and even moving into an assisted living facility of his choice. So perhaps it would be in your best interest to discuss these options with him, and let him decide which route he'd like to go. Good luck.
No matter what his last wishes may be or what happens with his money, it would be a huge mistake to leave your home and job. You can offer to help him find appropriate care and choose your level of involvement, a level that doesn’t sacrifice your own well being
That is very unreasonable and selfish on his part. Please don’t do it!! There’s hundreds of stories here where people left everything behind for their parent and 99.9% of them regret it,
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
He can leave his money to whomever he wants. But you don't need to give up your life for him either. In your place, I'd just say no.
Unless one is very wealthy, family members who are giving up jobs and benefits need to be paid for the care they are providing now.
First of all, who your father is leaving his estate to is irrelevant. It's his own choice.
Second, he need not discuss end of life plans with anyone. He can make his own decisions until he is unable, and at that time the doctors will contact the POA for health care he has chosen or his next of kin (in that order).
As to taking on 24/7 care of a senior, why do you think you might like to do that? Are you ready to give up your job? Is your father ready and willing to pay you the going rate for 24/7 care? (If so do the care plan with an attorney).
We see often on Forum that those who wish to leave their jobs, move in with elders and give 24/7 care end up homeless and jobless and without a job history often enough. Ultimately, however, whether you take on 24/7 care of your Dad or do not is entirely up to you.
Your father has many options to get the care he needs,(that don't include you) including home health agencies and even moving into an assisted living facility of his choice. So perhaps it would be in your best interest to discuss these options with him, and let him decide which route he'd like to go. Good luck.