My mom and I we very close. Sadly I lost her in January 2022. She passed away from complications associated with Covid and congestive heart failure. Mom was also diagnosed with dementia about 2 years before she passed. Her last year of life was especially difficult, as she was hospitalized several times. Each time she was released, the dementia became much worse. I moved her four times in one year. Each time to a different level of senior care. Finally memory care. During the month before she passed, my husband and I both got Covid so I could not visit my mom. Then my mom got Covid which increased the amount of time we were apart. It was during this period I received a call from Hospice she was dying. I went to be with her and the Hospice nurse told me it could be hours or a few days. My mom was not awake when I arrived and never opened her eyes while I was there. I left that evening to go home. Early the next morning I received a call that she had passed away.
The next week I had to move her things from her room. It was then that one of the aides told me that my mom said to her “they'ew not coming back”. Meaning her family was not coming back to see her. I wish I had never heard that. Now I feel so much guilt that she felt abandoned by me. But, with the Covid situation we just couldn’t be together the last few weeks of her life. Regardless, I could have had zoom calls with her or had done something more to communicate. Now I feel so guilty for not doing that. It’s difficult to handle.