My situation is such that I know my only option is to stay with my mom (86yo, multiple ailments) to try to care for her to the best of my abilities. So my question -or rather my plead for help- is to ask how do you do to truthfully not let what an elderly parent says or does affect one so deeply?
I am an only child and every time my mom yells at me, stops talking to me, refusing to eat, etc., as a defense mechanism, which really is coming from a deep depression, it really affects me.
Likely because caregiving is the most important role I currently have. I just want the best for my mom, but need to survive myself.
How do you preserve your sanity?
I truly feel completely lost.
May God bless you greatly caregivers🌹
Is her depression being treated? Her pain? If not, I would really push hard to get these things under control. If she refuses to go to the doctor, maybe there is some way you can get her to go by saying something like "insurance requires you to go to the doctor"? A little fib here and there to get some compliance could be in her best interest.
If that is not an option, do some research on depression and natural treatments for it. Supplements, sunshine, exercise, etc. If you go at it with an upbeat attitude and try to make it seem fun for her, maybe she will cooperate.
Why is staying with her your only option? Feeling stuck is NOT a good thing. You need to at least have an exit plan so that you know you are there by CHOICE, not by force.
Good luck.
It's hard. We just try to do the best we can.