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We have been trying to come up with a mixture of meds to get him thru these episodes without making him a zombie.
He needs rehab but has been turned down by 4 places because of the aggressiveness Help

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My husband also has vascular dementia and I was living your life. Finally, his doctor said he needed to go to a psychiartic hospital to get the proper combination of meds.
He was there for 4 wks and came back to memory care for the first time as they would not take him with his agressive behavior. He started acting out after one week and is now back at the hospital. such stress and sadness.
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Please I need help. My husband has vascular dementia, he is 65 years old. I can not stop working and the adult day care where he goes do not want him anymore, because he doesn't stop screaming and talking loud. I live in Miami and do not have anyone to help. I feel that i just can't take it anymore, spend all the time crying.
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My husband knows although only admits it once in awhile and yes
I told the facility
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The people at the facility need the information in order to provide appropriate treatment!
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Ebdaisy, you told your husband he is an alcoholic, or you told the doctor and people at the facility?
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Also his liver is perfect
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The raged started several months ago
And yes on the sly I told him he is an alcoholic as I said the rage comes at night
He just went to a rehab today and I'm sure they will throw him out or learn fast how to make him cope
He wants to go home if course all he wants now is a bar and a drink and go get out of where he is
Tell me Everyone are we having fun yet😱
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seems everyone is ignoring the fact that he's an alcoholic. alcohol fuels rage...has he been rageful in the past when drinking or is this something new?
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Ebdaisy, does the facility know he's an alcoholic? You can tell them on the sly. It is very important they know this as liver damage causes meds to be processed differently. They can become septic from many meds maybe he is already which could be causing the agitation. Been ther, done that and lost ny SO because he became septic from the liver not processing the antibiotics administered for osteomyelitis correctly. Also Ativan can have the completely opposite effect on the elderly as intended, happened with my mom. You only option may be a psychiatric hospital for a three day evaluation to get the behaviors leveled out. But, nothing may work because of the alcoholism. I would refuse to take this man home.
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Hired someone for atleast 3 to 4 hours during that time in the sundowners time. Trained companions or CNA can help most times when family cannot. Talk about other things, play games, maybe not the games with the exact rules. Dominos match up colors or shapes, cards, help fold towels... go outside watch the clouds, fill the air on your skin.. Go to a park... Air Condition mall. use wheelchair... have some ice cream... be sure and drink plently of water.
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Possibly a low dose anti anxiety med, like Diazepam could help.
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I'm assuming u have a doctors order for rehab. He should be able to help. Maybe get someone to come in the home at times he is good.
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So many things to reply to here......I agree with pamstegma on there is no reason to try to find pt for a patient that is not wanting to get help or might not understand why they need it. I also agree with bringing in home pt and that is adept at working with Alz/dementia patients. I would try to find a facility that you could maybe take for a couple of hours a day and let them work with him. Of course this would take drs. approval and his admittance with facility. You didn't say what the pt was for but I didn't have much hope for my mom to ever get better after one of her falls and she broke her tailbone. The facility begged me not to send her to a rehab and send her back to their facility and they would work with her. I was very concerned they couldn't get the job done and a week and a half later darn if she wasn't sitting up and semi walking again. Last but not least, ebdaisy1....we went through the drinking with my MIL. She wasn't an alcoholic but don't get in her way at 5:00p.m. for her evening drink. :) She lived in assisted living with her husband who had parkinsons and she had some light form of dementia. One of the head nurses there was very sympathetic to this and let us bring in a bottle for her and every evening at 4:30 she would fix her a "drink" which was almost all water. When she complained about it we would tell her it must be the scotch and she bought into it. Anyway, it was very much against the rules as you can imagine and weekends she did not get her drink but eventually she just never asked for it. I know there is medications, liability, etc. but if you see your husband everyday, don't take a bottle to him but just take enough to make him think he is winning. I know a lot of you are going to disagree with that but at my MIL age and if that gave her a little happiness (especially after my FIL died) then I was going to go for it. This dumb, evil disease takes away so much. I hate seeing my mom the way she is and getting worse everyday. Not talking, hardly eating, wheelchair bound. I hate it....so I say make them happy until the end. Good luck and God Bless......
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He is on several medications that are keeping him great in the day and then comes sundowners last night was the first time it wasn't bad
However as I said he is an alcoholic and gambler and now he is fighting to have a drink lol asked me to sneak it in
Says he is not giving up drinking and if I think he is I should divorce him so add this to the rest of my problem
The problem is during the day he is ok and understand thing s better. And then sundowner they are trying to get the meds correct for this but it is trial and error and I'm going to have a nervous breakdown
NOT LOL
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neurologist was not much help with my Alz husband but I found an internal med doc who specializes in geriatrics. She prescribed Ativan .5 mg twice a day and . .10mg celexa once a day and it worked. He is also on execlon patch 13.3 and nameda xr 28 mg once a day. It made a world of difference in his aggression.
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Also been trying to figure out what to do with husband who has vasclar dementia and gets agitated. Neurologist was no help. Everything I read says not to medicate...what to do. Been trying benedryl. Seems to help. Took him to ER once and they gave him benedryl. I think there is not much we can do. Wish we had an adult daycare memory care center in town where we live.
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Real talk to his doctor if he is resisted to help you may only be making matters worst just go with it hire. some good home help who know how to deal with it and don't pressure him to change let them sneek the help in a little at a time when he receptive of it men. in there right now or out don't respond well to pressure and he is stressed as it is losing time people and his life in what seems to be a dream that never end the past in part is gone and little by little today slips away leaving him in a limbo of pressure to know things he can't remember your doing your best just try to be him and your things to do will seem much clearer to you
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Talk to his Neurologist about the aggression, which can be managed with the right medication. There really is no point in sending him to PT rehab if he will not cooperate. The patient has to be willing to do the exercises and focused on his own recovery. No physical therapy group will take the risk of assault.
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Are you trying Memory Care facilities? They are trained to handle dementia/Alzheimer's patients.
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