Mom is in independent living facility but I have her escorted to breakfast and dinner. She has moderate alzheimers and is not confident talking to others . She will not go down to dinner, saying she doesnt feel good. The food is included in rent and since she doesnt cook, it's important that she get meals. What to do? How do I get her to go to meals?
It might take family members engaging in meals with her for a while to get to headed the right direction. Make sure you head down for the meal at the same time as others do so so she will get accustomed to the faces she will see. It takes repetition to become a habit.
If the staff has tried to help and failed, it may just be a time thing. Your Mom will eventually acclimate to the new surroundings and gain confidence.
As for eating, staff should provide some sustenance ... even after hours for those that can't make it to the dinning room. Talk to them.
Also, I'd f/u (follow up) with your Mom's PCP (primary care physician) because she may be slightly depressed and need a little boost.
Good luck!
Think of this as the Junior/Senior prom. Of course she is nervous breaking into a new crowd. Don't go to dinner by forcing her on other people. It's unattractive. If you have children you know that picking their friends and forcing them to like each other doesn't work. Seating assignments only work on cruise ships, and not really. When you changed schools, in your youth, you eventually found a new set of friends. It took time. Remind her of her self confidence going to that first coffee with the 'wives' or the first company party. She will remember. It's the same acting job she has done before and after time she might make friends. It's a process.