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Current situation update: I have had to be Primary care-giver for Mother, who is in good health, and mobility. The environment where she was staying, on prior arrangements, where Mom (Zeezee1) lived, is not conducive to her health & welfare.



My Apartment is a 2/1, ground level. I did have part-time activities, yet most of my free time is caring for Mother. I need some guidance. Please and Thnkyou!

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Is your mom currently living with you?

Can you please give more details so that we can assist you further?
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Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
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What exact question do you have for us?
You tell us that your mother is in good health, and that she has good mobility.
Basically it is sounding as though the two of you are roommates?

Yet you tell us that she has moved from current living situation (what was that situation? Long term care? ALF? Nursing Home? Independent Care? Own home?) because it was "not conducive to her health and welfare (in what ways was it not conducive? Please elaborate).

It seems to me that you currently have no specific question for us but I will give you just a couple of pointers.
1. Talk and be honest with Mom. Tell her that this moving in with you is on a trial basis and that the two of you need weekly meetings to see how it is working for EACH of you. And that every six months on the calendar you will each get together and decide if this living situation is working for both of you; if it isn't working for one of you then it isn't working and Mom will have to move.
2. Get together with an elder law attorney. Go over finances and paperwork to make sure you have it. Work out a written care contract and costs of shared housing. Mom should contribute to rental and utilitites as well as food costs. Make certain wills, poa papers, and etc are all done for EACH of you.
3. Be honest to tell Mom that if she requires more care than you are able to render physically or emotionally that she will move to ALF or Nursing home.

I wish you BOTH good luck. It isn't easy to live with another person, period! Take time for adjustment and address problems early on.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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You will need to ask something specific and tell us more about Moms health.

What do you mean that she has no insurance? Did she not work and earn credit towards Social Security and Medicare? Did she have a spouse who worked here and earned credits? Does she have a green card? Does she have 5 years of residency? At 5 years she is entitled to Medicaid for health.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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