My mother is very lonely. She refuses in-home help. She refuses assisted-living. Her friends are all dying. She has no hobbies. She doesn’t enjoy reading anymore she just stares at the television. She doesn’t initiate phone calls to anyone. People rarely call her. She has very few visitors. She expects me to be over there all the time, but my visits aren’t pleasant because I am the eating and medicine police. She doesn’t take her medicine without prompting. Now she has started telling me she’s taking it, when she has not. She doesn’t want to eat. I order delivery on a daily basis. She picks at it and that’s it. I don’t know what to do with her and I’m feeling very guilty because I know she’s lonely. I work part time and have a lot of activities. I don’t know how to cheer her up or get her in a positive mode. She is stage 4 dementia/Alzheimer’s and does not think anything is wrong. She’s just not as sharp as she used to be. She does not cook. She won’t even microwave. I’m afraid of doing anything that will make her even more dependent on me. I just don’t know what to do. As I’m reading some of the other comments, I’m guessing I have to let things fall apart before I can take any action. Otherwise it’s going to be a royal battle. What she really wants is for me to quit everything, move in with her and take care of all of her current needs. She refuses in-home assistance because she said she doesn’t need help. But she does.
