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I agree with DoingbestIcan. We are all adults and when part of a family that should be a strong tie, one of the strongest ever. When our parents find themselves in a situation of needing help, we can't just shirk our responsibility because it definitely will fall on someone else. Too many times the majority of the responsibility for an elderly parent falls on one maybe two people. I finally had to tell my brother and sister that I needed help when I felt I was on the verge of a breakdown. Now granted we were all close to my mom our whole lives and I cannot relate to anyone who had a bad relationship with their mom. But when I said this, they stepped up and had her every other weekend. I had her all through the week. We did what we could to keep her in my home and thank God we were able to do this. I just can't help but feel that if we all go through our lives and have a gut feeling and jump on that feeling and do whatever it is, we will live the rest of our lives in regret. Decisions must be thought over, prayed over and ultimately we must listen to God on how to proceed, not just our gut. My mom did not have a pleasant attitude the last couple of years of her life. It was very hard taking care of her at times, one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. You have to remind yourself that the disease is not who they are. The person they were is still deep down inside them, but they have to deal the only way they can sometimes. You take a very independent person and make them totally dependent on other people, I think we would all have a problem with this and no telling how we would react. But it was my responsibility. She's my mother.
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Jeanette who is a long time poster on this site put it very well once. She said take the words to that song "He ain't heavy, he's my Brother" but change brother to mother.
If you don't know the song, google it.
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Guilt is off the table-for today only. Not serving it up for dinner, either.
Wish I could help.
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