My 87 year old father is still living independently but comes to stay with me for a month at a time 3-4 times a year. He seems very depressed and his negativity is pretty overwhelming. Conversation consists of him ranting about politics, my siblings, prices, banks, etc. and he needs constant attention from me. He is financially secure and in relatively good health. I think he would definitely benefit from more activities and human contact but he refuses all my suggestions to join church groups, book clubs, and the like. Because he's so dependent on me, he is literally waiting at the door each day when I get home from work and intensely worried if I am even 10 minutes later than usual. Both myself and my teenager daughter are stressed by the situation, although we want to do our best by him. Any suggestions? I think assisted living would be great for him, but he refuses to consider moving out of his house.
You may want to consider getting him into a doctor, as well. He could be suffering from clinical depression. If that is the case and medication helps, he may be more compliant about other changes in his life. It's worth a try.
Take care,
Carol