So my 70 year old mother lives alone just down the road from us. She has Social Security and a small pension that my dad left her when he passed. However, she will always have a mortgage payment because of how many times she has refinanced. So money is running tight. My husband refuses to let her move in with us even though we have the room and we have no children. I honestly don’t know if that would be a good decision anyway for us because of how tense things would get between all of us. Problem is... she is Bipolar One and is more of a depressive Bipolar (doesn’t have a lot of manic swings). She is having an awful time getting a job because she’s always in a fog. She is actually functioning well on her own in her one story rancher. However, she has a cat who my husband says has peed on everything. There is an awful stench when we walk into her house and while it doesn’t smell like cat pee to me... he says that’s what it is. He says we can’t let her live like that and she has absolutely no extra money to put in all new carpeting and padding as we’d probably be looking at around $6,000. Are there organizations that would help with this? I don’t want her to end up in a state facility. I can’t bear to see my mom end up there. She does have Amish neighbors as we live in one of those types of communities in the countryside. So we’re going to see if any of them could help. I just don’t know what to do and my husband says we need to just call Office of Aging. But all my friends in the geriatric nursing care field (I have a few) tell me I do NOT want to go that route. They say once they’re involved they’ll never let we’ll enough alone. Any advice on home improvement organizations would be greatly appreciated. I’m in such a bind here!!
The vinegar smell will go away as it dries and it kills the enzymes that cause the odor.
Cheap effective solution for odors and a good stain remover.
If your mom is competent, no agency will ever say she can't live as she chooses, filthy, unsanitary and worse, it's called rights. I know from personal experience that no one will intervene because of the odor or mess.
Your husband sounds like he is spoiling for a fight, are other things going on and he is using this situation to be ugly and cover the real issue?
Then you say it's hard for her to get a job b/c of Bipolar One and always being in a fog. At 70 years old, I would imagine it's next to impossible for her to find ANY job, regardless of her state of mind or anything else. I am 62 and it took me forever to find a job...........age discrimination is a very real thing in our society.
I guess I don't see the 'bind' you're in. Your mother seems to be doing fine on her own, at least for the moment, so maybe just leave well enough alone. If you feel the need to find out if there's financial help available to her for new carpeting, Ahmijoy gave you some excellent resources to check out. If you don't want to calling the Area Agency on Aging, I guess your only option to help your mother is to foot the bill yourself for whatever home improvements she needs.
Best of luck!