This sister has 2 daughters. The one appointed as POA has almost nothing to do with her. The other daughter has so many problems of her own that she cannot deal with my sister.
My sister is showing more signs of decline with several mishaps with her car.
She is very hard of hearing and often cannot hear on her flip phone. She gets mixed up about doctor appointments. She does not shower or shampoo and has a sour smell about her. She also is a hoarder and seems incapable of dealing with that.
In phone conversations, she constantly repeats things she has told me many times in the past.
A librarian has offered to help her learn how to better use her flip phone. When I ask about following up with that, she says she is too busy.
She also lives on just Social Security.
While care about her well being, I live far from her and have a multitude of my own health problems.
I am thinking of contacting some of her local agencies anonymously to get options for her, then sending a letter to the daughters to share that information. I do not have their phone numbers, nor email. I am not too hopeful that they would appreciate the information.
At this point I am concerned that if I tell an agency her name and where she lives, the will take one look at her and her place and move her to God knows where.
Any suggestions would be appreciated.Thanks!
Completely FREE phone system with free installation and training. It takes oral conversations and types out the message on the screen. It's like closed captions on tv. This is a free federal benefit for people who are hard of hearing. Paid for by a tiny federal excise tax on all our phone bills.
It dials, rings and works just like a regular phone. It includes a speaker phone, answering machine, Bluetooth connectivity. CaptionCall Mobile makes captioning available on Apple iOS and Android devices.
Call the police and request a welfare check. They'll look in on her, make sure she has food, and is safe. They'll also get the contact information of both the daughters and will call them to see what's going on. They will contact Adult Protective Services if need be. This path will happen immediately, not when APS gets around to checking on her.
Someone called for a welfare check on my parents which horrified and embarrassed all of us. My mother had dementia and was no longer out in public, but my dad was completely fine, still driving safely, and engaged in numerous community activities. I was there weekly and took them out to lunch and knew they were doing fine.
However, my dad willingly let the police in, answered their questions, and showed them the contents of their refrigerator to assure them they had plenty of food. (He actually loved cooking and cooked like he was feeding an army.) He gave the police my contact information and my brother's, and they called us. We corroborated everything they'd seen, and they closed the inquiry.
We never learned who called for the welfare check, but once we got over the shock we appreciated that someone cared enough to call. We found out that the police department had a program where they'd store a copy of the house key in case my folks needed help and couldn't unlock the door, and we knew that there were people nearby who cared about their safety.
Please make the call. It's anonymous, and they won't cart your sister off. They will, however, ensure she's safe and gets the help she needs. They may even be able to get the daughters' contact information for you.