It’s just about time to place my husband. His overall health is pretty good. But he has tremors that often interfere with his eating, dressing, toileting, etc. He barely walks with a Rollator but often gets stuck in a stutter step, and has fallen many times. Most of the time I can help him up but have had to call for assistance many times too. I’m starting to burn out. I think he understands that but he expects me to care for him. I absolutely know for a fact that if the situation was reversed he would not care for me the same way. He would have hired 24/7 help or placed me already before now. He would never do the dressing, batheing, feeding, cooking, washing, laundry, health care for me that I do for him. How to deal with the guilt?
As in:
"I am so sorry, but I cannot care for you in the home anymore".
Then you see to business so that you can continue to provide loving and gentle support with visitation.
There is no room for argument and there is no other way around this. Impossible is impossible.
Don't let the guilt eat you up. For his safety and your sanity, for both of your well beings, placement is most likely the best answer.
Best of luck.
See an Elder Lawyer to have ur assets split. Then u can go from there what type of facility u can place him.