Dad has been with us for two stays - one in January that lasted until March, and another from end of October until now. He is currently away visiting with relatives at his home in the lake, but will return this week. We have a room available for him to move into at the independent care facility he likes by the end of January. He is currently renting a room at a different facility related to the one he likes, because it allowed him to move higher up on a list for move-ins at his favorite place. We are simply waiting until the new apartment is ready for move-in.
My husband is tired of him being at our house. He wants him to move into the apartment he’s leasing now (he’s never lived in it) for the last few weeks until the new apartment is ready.
I don’t want my dad to feel unwanted (even though he is, I guess), and I think having to stay in an unfurnished apartment for 2-3 weeks until the one he wants is ready will emphasize this. He is struggling with short-term memory loss, lack of mobility (he uses a walker to get around) and incontinence. He’s not an easy patient.
we are lucky that the independent living place that he is moving to has many supportive services. Residents can pay for additional nursing support, such as administering medication, and even support dressing and toileting. As residents get closer to the point of needing assisted-living, these professionals will inform you when it’s time to move. They even have several rooms specifically reserved for needier residents, that provide three meals daily and assistance with dressing, showering and daily needs. It’s truly a wonderful place, and there’s nothing else quite like it around here. It’s so nice to have a sounding board to share concerns like this! Glad I found this site!
Your husband is drawing a line and I would not cross it. Your husband already knows "it's only 2 weeks" and yet he still doesn't want your dad back. If your husband has had enough, I think you need to be the one to make other arrangements for you and your dad.
What about a respite stay at an assisted living facility? Some places offer this and then you can remain home with your husband and can merely visit him as often as you wish.
I feel for all of you.
Best wishes to and your family.