I'm here to help both my dad and her but it seems she's always yelling at me or finding fault in what I do. Not to mention that I could never do as much as she has. Please can someone help? I love both my parents and only want to make things easier for her.
It’s just hard. I know that you want to help both of them.
It’s very hard for all of you. It sounds like your mom is taking out all of her frustration on you, which absolutely isn’t fair and certainly doesn’t help matters but unfortunately, happens in these circumstances.
Have you suggested other options to your mom? What about getting help from Council on Aging in your area?
Council on Aging will do an assessment and if your dad qualifies then you will receive help from an agency to help care for your dad. This would free up some of the pressure that is placed on you.
Have you discussed speaking to a social worker to help plan for his care in the future such as a suitable facility to care for him?
Also, there is respite care that may help your mom catch her breath again. Some assisted living facilities offer to care for a family member so the family can rest. Call and get the price and relay the information to your mom.
Wishing you and your family all the best.
My father is a Type II diabetic and suffered a serious stroke in late 2015 that left him 70% physically capable. My mother has been his primary caregiver since.
They were both hospitalized last year for complications due to COVID. My mom’s condition was much more serious and she had to be hospitalized a second time and undergo rehab for 3 months.
We required home health and 24 hour help for my Dad even with my presence in the household in her absence.
My mom returned after rehab and it has been a struggle to continue the same level of care she used to provide for him.
She was diagnosed with a recurrence of breast cancer a few weeks ago.
Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.