My husband had Alzheimer’s and congestive heart failure. The caregivers I hired were from a known agency yet several stole a number of valuables… ididn’t know until after my husband passed and I waspacking to move. Also, I got Hospice at Home duringhis last months. The nurse assigned to us refused to come as he was dying. She was tending her grandchildren. She finally came but didn’t stay. Hiscondition quickly worsened, but my calls did not bringher back. I was told to keep upping his medicine.I had a caregiver come to be with me, but she didn’tknow how to handle such a dire situation. I willnever get over the impact of all that happened. My husband died about 2 hrs after Hospice left.
As for finding a good caregiver, I used a nationwide company as my Dad needed 3 shifts of caregivers. The Agency, which was licensed, bonded, and insured, would send out different caregivers for the different shifts. At the end of the week, Dad would tell me he liked a certain caregiver, so the Agency assigned her for the 1st shift. The caregiver was older, her own Dad was from my Dad's generation, so it made conversations easy. She was with my Dad for over a year. The other two shifts, Dad was happy with whomever the Agency sent.
As for stealing things, I never noticed anything out of place. Now, when I was packing up my parents house to sell, I couldn't find a certain ring my Mom had. It was a mystery. Yes, I thought about the caregivers. A year later, while cleaning a basket of artificial flowers that I brought to my house from my parent's house, I noticed something shiny down in the basket... sure enough, there was the missing ring.
1- Are you absolutely sure that the caregivers stole things? My mother had dementia and in the beginning phase when she had an in-home caregiver my mom continually and impulsively tried to give away tons of her possessions to her caregiver. Caregiver never asked for any of them or accepted them, but my mom kept trying. Clothing, cookware, jewelry, furniture, etc. So it's possible that your dad gave some things to the caregivers. On the other hand, maybe he didn't and they were stolen. Regardless, it's probably too late now to do anything about any theft, unless there was a camera in the room or there are witnesses. Let it go.
2- I'm not sure if you need another caregiver at this time, or whether you're just feeling disappointed and bitter (?) and you want to vent, which is totally okay here on this forum. You're grieving and try to accept that you may be focusing on things that won't matter to you later.
3- It's very hard to find good in-home caregivers these days. Even the best agencies' job requirement for new hires is "breathing". Why? Because during the pandemic most caregivers lost most of their customers because clients wouldn't risk exposure to covid by letting someone into the house who could be a covid carrier. Most of the caregivers who couldn't make a living moved to other jobs, Instacart, McDonalds, maybe they went back to school to get their LVN or RN certifications so they'd make more money when/if caregiver demand was revitalized. (BTW, did you know that a person working at McDonalds makes more money than a caregiver makes? Not exaggerating, it's true. so many caregivers never went back to caregiving after getting jobs in other industries that were better compensated and less stressful.)
4- I forgot my last point ;=) Oh, right - plan on going through several caregivers before you find one that you can trust.
Being mostly caregivers ourselves, you can be certain we, like you, have had both bad and good experiences.
I am sorry for the loss of your husband, and that someone was not there to support you as he was passing.
If you wish to try to access any care from advertisers who support this particular forum do scroll down the page to the bottom left and press on "in home care". I have not used it and can not assure you of anything about it; you may be more comfortable seeking help in your own area.