My 86 y/o father lives with me, and recently he is not changing his depends or going to the bathroom. He has dementia, but I feel he has become lazy about it. He will go all day w/o changing until he soaks through his clothes and chair. The only time I can get him to change now, is when I dress him or put his pjs on him at night. If I ask him to use the bathroom or to change, he gets mad at me, yells and slaps me, and calls me the B word. I spend all day doing his laundry, washing his chair cover, and showering him because of this. The other day I caught him going to the bathroom off the front porch! I am at my wits end!
Best of luck