Rather than asking "do you want to wash?" Lead them (one at a time) to the bathroom to 'freshen up'.
Once there, have a stool to sit near the sink. Prompt & guide washing face & hands with a cloth. No forcing. If ok, after face & hands you sneak in pits & bits.
Can introduce changing clothes to routine. "Well since your shirt is off, may as well wash your back 😉" Fill the sink, wet wash top half of body, dry dress. Then lower. Aka 'bird bath'.
Keeping warm is often a priority. Focus on the soft towel, then the positive of being nice & fresh.
The trick is to get into the bathroom. Once there, they may feel ok to continue. Even the very stubborn sometimes give in 'oh I suppose I may as well while I'm here'. Oh yes you say, that's a good idea Mom/Dad/Sir/Madam.
Or if they can take a joke, threaten to drag them off to the zoo to be hosed down with the animals. Coz ya smell like a bear Pops 😁
Have you considered the no rinse products? They're available for hair and body. I learned about them when my father was in rehab, and when I was in the hospital for a few days. I keep them handy at home just in case.
They're not immersion products; they're applied like any lotion and don't even have to be washed off.
JoAnn raises a critical issue: grab bars and safety. Getting in and out of a shower tub can be a hazard. So are standing showers.
Case on point: someone I know who's a mountain climber, and very skilled, slipped in a shower and ended up in the hospital. It ended his mountain climbing career.
Showers and tubs can be dangerous places.
If you're not comfortable with no rinse products, consider another option, one which I can't take credit for b/c another poster suggested it years ago. Make the occasion something special. Play their favorite music, have relaxing talks, or something that makes them feel less anxious. Either before or afterwards (probably the latter is better), have some type of celebration by either taking them somewhere special, giving them flowers, a special food, or small gift.
The goal is to focus on the rewards, to help them get past the process.
MJ also makes a good point about now showering or wetting their head. In my experience, for me, cold hair leads to a cold head, and that shivering is unsettling.
Yes, they don't need a shower more than 3x a week. The aides should be provided with nice big wipes, I used Huggies because they were big and thick. They use them when toileting to make sure they are clean.
Most people with Dementia do not like showers. I never had that problem with Mom. Her shower had a bar to hang onto going in and out of the shower stall. One on the wall. I got her a shower bench with no back, makes it easier to wash their backs. I made sure the bathroom was toasty warm. Cold bothers them. Of course a handheld shower head. I would first wash her down with water and then quickly wash her. Mom never minded her hair washed just complain the soap hurt her eyes. So we switched to baby shampoo. In between baths I would wash under her arms before I put deodorant on her. She likes to wash her face with clear water.
My daughter worked in Rehab/NHs for 20 yrs. She claims you make them think they made the decision. "Mrs. Jones, wouldn't you feel so much better if you had a nice shower and got all nice and clean and smelly good and clean clothes to put on? Mrs Jones then agrees because she has been given a choice not "told" what to do.
If you have a tub, there are shower chairs that go over the tub and you slide the seat back and forth. There are also grab bars that attach to the side of the tub. If no bars in the tub, you can buy suction cup ones that I had no problem with but you do need a smooth surface. My surround is made of a plastic with big tile look squares. I was able to place each end of the bar into a square and lock on. I found with my nephew it did not work on a painted wall or the smaller tiles.
Use a shower chair and don't put water on their head. My mother lost her mind if I tried to give her a normal, shower, but once she was in a nursing home, they had little trouble oecaure she was sitting on a shower chair (no fear of falling anymore), and they used a special hat thing to keep water from running over her face when they washed her hair. She thought she was drowning when water ran on her face.
Make sure the water is warm enough and use a hand-held sprayer. Unless your having to clean up incontinence messes, they only need a shower a couple of times a week, so don't nag them for daily showers.
Once there, have a stool to sit near the sink. Prompt & guide washing face & hands with a cloth. No forcing. If ok, after face & hands you sneak in pits & bits.
Can introduce changing clothes to routine. "Well since your shirt is off, may as well wash your back 😉" Fill the sink, wet wash top half of body, dry dress. Then lower. Aka 'bird bath'.
Keeping warm is often a priority. Focus on the soft towel, then the positive of being nice & fresh.
The trick is to get into the bathroom. Once there, they may feel ok to continue. Even the very stubborn sometimes give in 'oh I suppose I may as well while I'm here'. Oh yes you say, that's a good idea Mom/Dad/Sir/Madam.
Or if they can take a joke, threaten to drag them off to the zoo to be hosed down with the animals. Coz ya smell like a bear Pops 😁
They're not immersion products; they're applied like any lotion and don't even have to be washed off.
JoAnn raises a critical issue: grab bars and safety. Getting in and out of a shower tub can be a hazard. So are standing showers.
Case on point: someone I know who's a mountain climber, and very skilled, slipped in a shower and ended up in the hospital. It ended his mountain climbing career.
Showers and tubs can be dangerous places.
If you're not comfortable with no rinse products, consider another option, one which I can't take credit for b/c another poster suggested it years ago. Make the occasion something special. Play their favorite music, have relaxing talks, or something that makes them feel less anxious. Either before or afterwards (probably the latter is better), have some type of celebration by either taking them somewhere special, giving them flowers, a special food, or small gift.
The goal is to focus on the rewards, to help them get past the process.
MJ also makes a good point about now showering or wetting their head. In my experience, for me, cold hair leads to a cold head, and that shivering is unsettling.
Good luck with whatever you try.
Most people with Dementia do not like showers. I never had that problem with Mom. Her shower had a bar to hang onto going in and out of the shower stall. One on the wall. I got her a shower bench with no back, makes it easier to wash their backs. I made sure the bathroom was toasty warm. Cold bothers them. Of course a handheld shower head. I would first wash her down with water and then quickly wash her. Mom never minded her hair washed just complain the soap hurt her eyes. So we switched to baby shampoo. In between baths I would wash under her arms before I put deodorant on her. She likes to wash her face with clear water.
My daughter worked in Rehab/NHs for 20 yrs. She claims you make them think they made the decision. "Mrs. Jones, wouldn't you feel so much better if you had a nice shower and got all nice and clean and smelly good and clean clothes to put on? Mrs Jones then agrees because she has been given a choice not "told" what to do.
If you have a tub, there are shower chairs that go over the tub and you slide the seat back and forth. There are also grab bars that attach to the side of the tub. If no bars in the tub, you can buy suction cup ones that I had no problem with but you do need a smooth surface. My surround is made of a plastic with big tile look squares. I was able to place each end of the bar into a square and lock on. I found with my nephew it did not work on a painted wall or the smaller tiles.
Make sure the water is warm enough and use a hand-held sprayer. Unless your having to clean up incontinence messes, they only need a shower a couple of times a week, so don't nag them for daily showers.