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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Trying to untangle the issue a bit: What has been his normal bowel habit? (every day, every other day, twice a day, twice a week, e.g.) Is he still able to pee standing up? - at least approximately into the toilet bowl? When (i.e. on what sort of occasion) are you encouraging him to sit on the toilet? - to a fixed schedule, or when you have suspicions that he might need to go, or what? What happens when you leave him to his own devices? - does he attempt to use the bathroom normally (but get the location wrong, e.g.) or is he physically incontinent as well?
i will suggest a portable toilet. u can raise it up for easier use, it can follow u around the house or even into the garden :). the bucket is removable and easy to clean. This has been our best purchase so far, along the Alzheimer journey. We get a lot of aggression around using the toilet, this has saved us many times. u don't get cornered in an enclosed space when the person lashes out.
Couple questions. Is the toilet a raised one (ADA height)? It is easier to sit down and stand up when the toilet is a bit higher. Is it a round bowl or an elongated one? An elongated bowl is easier and more comfortable. If he has trouble with getting up there are frames you can attach so that it is like arms next to you (like an arm chair) making it easy to push yourself up from a sitting position. (Or I have taken a walker and placed it backwards up against the toilet tank so that there is a frame that can be used to help push yourself up. (I hope that made sense) Does he use the bathroom to shower? Brush his teeth? If so then it is the toilet he has a problem with. Try changing the toilet seat to a different colored one if your current seat is white. A different brighter color might make it easier for him to see. (If you can't find one use spray paint to change the color of the one you have.) If he does not want to use the bathroom at all check for safety problems. Is the floor slippery? Is the entire room 1 shade or color? It can be difficult to see and tell the difference between the wall and the floor, the toilet, the counters if they are all a similar color. Replace all underwear that he has with a Pull Up brief and don't worry about the toilet. Chalk this up to another decline that you deal with.
Like BarbBrooklyn said it's probably time to have him full-time in Depends or the like. Before my husband was bedridden, he would try and stand at the toilet to pee, but he would end up getting it all over the floor, and so I made him sit on the toilet when he had to pee. He didn't like it, and complained, but I was insistent, and he eventually did it without me having to follow him in the bathroom to make sure he was sitting. I would often overnight hold the plastic urinal for him while he was in bed so he could pee, and so he didn't have to get out of bed, as he was a fall risk. Eventually my husband was wearing Depends 24/7, and later had a supra pubic catheter put in, which was a Godsend, because even though my husband would have his Depends on, he still wanted to get up every hour to pee in the toilet, which meant he nor I got any sleep. Often times incontinence will be the straw that will break the camels back, and a caregiver will decide to place their loved one in the appropriate facility. I wish you the very best.
There can be a problem with this, in that sometimes the person is so intent on wrestling the pull up off that - how can I put it - they run out of time with the hose pointing in the worst possible direction(s).
If he's actually incontinent and is still able to understand what the briefs are and how to get them on and off, then they're very helpful, I agree.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Trying to untangle the issue a bit:
What has been his normal bowel habit? (every day, every other day, twice a day, twice a week, e.g.)
Is he still able to pee standing up? - at least approximately into the toilet bowl?
When (i.e. on what sort of occasion) are you encouraging him to sit on the toilet? - to a fixed schedule, or when you have suspicions that he might need to go, or what?
What happens when you leave him to his own devices? - does he attempt to use the bathroom normally (but get the location wrong, e.g.) or is he physically incontinent as well?
Is the toilet a raised one (ADA height)? It is easier to sit down and stand up when the toilet is a bit higher.
Is it a round bowl or an elongated one? An elongated bowl is easier and more comfortable.
If he has trouble with getting up there are frames you can attach so that it is like arms next to you (like an arm chair) making it easy to push yourself up from a sitting position. (Or I have taken a walker and placed it backwards up against the toilet tank so that there is a frame that can be used to help push yourself up. (I hope that made sense)
Does he use the bathroom to shower? Brush his teeth? If so then it is the toilet he has a problem with. Try changing the toilet seat to a different colored one if your current seat is white. A different brighter color might make it easier for him to see. (If you can't find one use spray paint to change the color of the one you have.)
If he does not want to use the bathroom at all check for safety problems.
Is the floor slippery?
Is the entire room 1 shade or color? It can be difficult to see and tell the difference between the wall and the floor, the toilet, the counters if they are all a similar color.
Replace all underwear that he has with a Pull Up brief and don't worry about the toilet. Chalk this up to another decline that you deal with.
Eventually my husband was wearing Depends 24/7, and later had a supra pubic catheter put in, which was a Godsend, because even though my husband would have his Depends on, he still wanted to get up every hour to pee in the toilet, which meant he nor I got any sleep.
Often times incontinence will be the straw that will break the camels back, and a caregiver will decide to place their loved one in the appropriate facility. I wish you the very best.
If he's actually incontinent and is still able to understand what the briefs are and how to get them on and off, then they're very helpful, I agree.