My wife of 63 years has been diagnosed with MCI , I’m her full time caregiver. I’m happy with that role but often have to correct or should I say suggest when she forgets normal activities and do this without causing tension.
You "go with the flow" If she forgets something you can gently cue her. You can ignore what she forgot (if it really is not important) Don't argue. You will never win an argument with a person that has dementia. An argument will upset both of you and can make her more agitated.
If there is an Adult Day Program in your area get her involved. It will give you a break, it will give her a break and it will get her engaged in activities. If there is no Day Program get a caregiver to come in at least 2 times a week. That way she gets used to someone else helping, you get a chance to get out and get some things done and this also gives you a break from caregiving.
Nick, whatever you do, don't argue with her when she doesn't get something right or forgets how to do something, as your wife's brain is now broken and will never get better only worse, and she can't help it. You have to now be the brain for the two of you. And you do it with gentleness, kindness, and love, just how you would want someone to treat you if your brain was broken. And of course there will be times that you have to say "no" if it means keeping your wife safe and out of harms way. You will learn as you take this very difficult journey with your wife what she responds best to and what she does not. And don't forget that as this horrific disease progresses that the woman you married is still in there somewhere, even if you don't get to see her much anymore. Please make sure that you're taking good care of yourself, as you matter too in this equation. You do not want to be in this alarming statistic of 40% of caregivers caring for someone with dementia who will die before the one they're caring for from stress related issues do you? Self care is that important. So make sure you're asking for help, taking some get away breaks and if and when your wife's care gets to be too much for you, that you get her placed in the best facility you can afford. I wish you well as you walk this difficult journey with your wife.
If she forgets something you can gently cue her.
You can ignore what she forgot (if it really is not important)
Don't argue. You will never win an argument with a person that has dementia.
An argument will upset both of you and can make her more agitated.
If there is an Adult Day Program in your area get her involved. It will give you a break, it will give her a break and it will get her engaged in activities.
If there is no Day Program get a caregiver to come in at least 2 times a week. That way she gets used to someone else helping, you get a chance to get out and get some things done and this also gives you a break from caregiving.
You have to now be the brain for the two of you. And you do it with gentleness, kindness, and love, just how you would want someone to treat you if your brain was broken.
And of course there will be times that you have to say "no" if it means keeping your wife safe and out of harms way.
You will learn as you take this very difficult journey with your wife what she responds best to and what she does not.
And don't forget that as this horrific disease progresses that the woman you married is still in there somewhere, even if you don't get to see her much anymore.
Please make sure that you're taking good care of yourself, as you matter too in this equation. You do not want to be in this alarming statistic of 40% of caregivers caring for someone with dementia who will die before the one they're caring for from stress related issues do you? Self care is that important.
So make sure you're asking for help, taking some get away breaks and if and when your wife's care gets to be too much for you, that you get her placed in the best facility you can afford.
I wish you well as you walk this difficult journey with your wife.