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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I hope that the wife can see a Certified Health Aide coming in to assist her as a "beauty treat". Getting her "hair done" starts with a thorough shampoo, and then a blow dry. I think the wife will cooperate better with an Outsider coming in. The wife could benefit from a personal care assistant for bathing and personal hygiene, most certainly. Would the wife still be able to go to the Beauty Shop/Hair Salon, where she would be leaned back in comfy chair, hair washed into a basin? If that would frighten her, then it's a bad idea. I can see from your profile that you are a helper and advocate for the elderly and infirm. You most likely have the skill to assist the husband in making a big deal about the "Beauty Day" that occurs when the personal care assistant/CNA comes in to bathe wife, clip her nails (maybe with a hand massage), get a good thorough shampoo, etc. Most husbands might be clueless as to how to pull this off (Beauty Day) but you "Make a Difference" have a magic touch with the elderly and you can help husband set the stage for this to happen. He's not going to be able to encourage her enough to get her to take charge of her personal hygiene. A big Tea Party with Beauty Day is much more likely to appeal to the husband and the wife, with a Personal Attendant coming in to "pamper" his wife on her Beauty Day. Worth a try, anyway.
I agree that you should try (if you haven’t already) having an aide come in to shower her. We cared for my MIL when she was on hospice and before hospice was set up I showered her several times. I could tell she was much more comfortable once she had an experienced aide helping her (she didn’t have dementia). I did my best but I just don’t have the experience and confidence that she did. If she has any aversion to bathing she may try harder to manipulate someone closer to them than they would a stranger. Also it’s very important to have the room warm enough and a comfortable, secure seat for her.
I got a Certified Nurses assistant who helped with bathing and Hygiene . They order a special chair to slide them On in the shower . Medicare covers the cost. At the doctors we had a Podiatrist . The CNA was terrific and she became friends with My Dad and did Light housekeeping . You May want to Lighten your Load and get some help with Hygiene and Bathing .
In addition to Ohwow's suggestion - taking her out to the salon for a shampoo a couple of time a month might work for her hair (depending on her previous habits). People who have bought bidet toilet seats rave about how fresh and clean they feel.
There's no sure way of doing that as each brain and each person with this disease is different. Approaches are "nested" according to the situation and the family/people and the surrounding circumstances about the scenario. You may roll your eyes at this answer, but it's true. I've seen people with advanced dementia/Alzheimer's sit perfectly still getting bathed, appearing more than cooperative. And then I've seen people who were just diagnosed become very combative and angry when others try to help. Perhaps if the person you're speaking about doesn't want to bath or lacks the know how to do so, it may take further evaluation and a softer approach or an approach that is more assisted. Clearly, the husband is in need of some homecare assistance with caring for his wife or it's time to move her into memory care/facility.
You may need to have someone come in and assist. Like visiting angels or another care giving service. Sometimes an outsider can get the job done whereas a family member may be easily intimidated by the crying or words used by the patient. Blessings to you this is not easy
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I've seen people with advanced dementia/Alzheimer's sit perfectly still getting bathed, appearing more than cooperative. And then I've seen people who were just diagnosed become very combative and angry when others try to help.
Perhaps if the person you're speaking about doesn't want to bath or lacks the know how to do so, it may take further evaluation and a softer approach or an approach that is more assisted.
Clearly, the husband is in need of some homecare assistance with caring for his wife or it's time to move her into memory care/facility.
Do sponge baths in between if needed. Also, dry shampoo is a help.
Do you have outside help? People seem to cooperate more with others. They may be able to convince her to do things more easily.
Wishing you and your wife well.