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5 months ago I filed for guardianship of my dad who is both mentally and physically incapacitated from Parkinson's and Lewy Body dementia, and requires the highest level of 24/7 care, to stop my mom from moving him with her to a single bedroom apt in a memory care facility hundreds of miles away, (where her horrible family lives) she claims she could provide some of his care, against the advice of his Dr's and social workers, and, thankfully, the court visitor.


He has received excellent care in an excellent LTC facility for over 2 years, which is paid for by LTC insurance. My mom, who was his POA, (they are still married), lives in an independent living apartment 2 miles away from him, and is in a wheelchair. She has been declining mentally for the past year to the point that in order to stop her from moving him I filed for guardianship.


She objected to me being appointed as guardian, so the court visitor recommended a 3rd party professional guardian for dad, which is a godsend! The new guardian stopped the move and has protected my dad from my mom and is amazing!


My mom's behavior during her visits with my dad has caused his health to decline even more. Now my mom is claiming she didn't know what she was signing in her attorney's office, when she signed the papers agreeing to this new guardian, doesn't agree with the new guardian and wanted to file for a new guardianship in which SHE is appointed.


Her attorney withdrew from the case because he didn't agree that what she was doing is in my dad's best interests, so she found a new attorney, who is her friend, who has never handled even 1 guardianship case, and convinced him to file.


Of course me and my brothers objected, and we had to go to court over this. What should have been a 1 hour hearing was 6 hours! She and her new attorney turned it into a circus! I thought my brothers and I were on trial! She convinced people in her church that my brothers and I had lied and stolen from her, and even had people testify and say horrible things about us - and we had never even met them!


My attorney was stunned because none of what she and her attorney said and brought to court was relevant, but the kind judge wanted her to "have her say." She acted ridiculous in court. But now it's been over 5 weeks and the judge has still not made a decision. In the meantime, she thinks she WAS granted guardianship and continued in her plans to move my dad, which upsets him to the point he won't eat, drink or sleep, so his guardian had to restrict her visits. She is also not speaking to any of her children despite our repeated attempts.


My dad's guardian wants to try to get appointed as my mom's guardian, since she's doing other irrational things, but since she still has the capacity to take care of herself, etc. it most likely won't happen any time soon.


Is there a way to "nudge the judge" just to find out why it's taking so long? My attorney says it's still listed as "Under Advisement" and we just have to wait. I'm glad my dad is safely under the care of the 3rd party guardian, but my mom is wreaking havoc in the meantime!


And now my dad gets to pay for the hearing: 4 attorneys, the guardian's time, the court visitor's time, and the 6 hours of court time, which will likely drain a huge chunk of their small savings, thanks to my mom!

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Your attorney should be able to contact the judge's office and find out what is causing the delay. It may be the judge is waiting on a report from someone, like your father's 3rd party guardian or a health care professional at your father's LTC. If your mother is claiming she signed legal documents in her attorney's office and "didn't know what she was signing" and made some other slips as she had her say, the judge may be considering appointing a guardian ad litum for your mother so he can require a medical assessment of her status. Or the judge may be working to get your mother to withdraw her petition in a manner where she can not just refile if she loses this petition. If the judge is trying to work a reasonable settlement with your mother's attorney who is inexperienced in elder law, it may take longer. Please understand if a key player is unavailable (like the judge or an attorney having cataract surgery) everything can be delayed until that player is available again.
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Springchix Oct 2019
Thank you! That makes sense - I hadn't put it all in that perspective - the fact that there are so many players here. No wonder it's taking so long.
Thanks for your reply.
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You are paying your attorney to handle this for you. You should not have to “nudge “ anyone but him/her to get this done. He/she should be following this and making sure it’s done in an speedy fashion. It does sound though, as if there is a whole lot going on here. Call your attorney tomorrow and ask for a complete report on what’s already been done, what needs to be done and what the time frame is for resolution. If they drop the ball again, find another attorney.
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