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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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I just skimmed over you posts. I found "I am a pleaser" and "he guilts me and calls me hard hearted". You were not his mothers keeper. You've done ur caregiving. I hope you are going to Florida. Don't allow him guilt you into not going. If he wants to be part of ur life he is going to have to learn ur an independent woman. At 74 you do what you want. If he wants to be part of that OK, but do not allow him to tell u how to live ur life. This is ur time. Please don't waste it on someone who is selfcentered.
Your last post was Dec 16th and you were planning on going away. Hope u did.
Now its Jan 7, 22 days later. So in that time your BFs mother has died? And you think thats enough time to grieve. I would say that process doesn't start until the funeral is over and friends and family have gone home and you r now alone. From your posts BFs mother was #1. He has told you that.
Here's how I look at ur situation. You are more into him than he is you. You have said this is not the kind of relationship u want. And you deserve more. You deserve to be #1 in some ones life. Personally, I would back off. Keep your dignity. Give him space. Let him come to you all the way. Don't get excited over the first call. Make him work for you. You will feel so much better about yourself.
You can't put a timeline on grief. But I understand your point cause I always put my mom first and knew that my hubs was getting the leftovers.
My relationship is quite different now that my mom is gone. It's like I started to get to know my hubs again. Hasn't always been a positive experience but it's still a work in progress.
Along with the grief there will also no doubt be responsibilities in dealing with her estate, both physical possessions and any monetary assets. Both can occupy someone's attention for a considerable amount of time.
When it comes to grief there is no right or wrong answer. But if the inability to deal with the grief is affecting your relationship, that would be a problem. Only you can decide how much you are able & willing to tolerate. assuming you are talking about your significant other, has he/she been to grief counseling or sought help yet?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Now its Jan 7, 22 days later. So in that time your BFs mother has died? And you think thats enough time to grieve. I would say that process doesn't start until the funeral is over and friends and family have gone home and you r now alone. From your posts BFs mother was #1. He has told you that.
Here's how I look at ur situation. You are more into him than he is you. You have said this is not the kind of relationship u want. And you deserve more. You deserve to be #1 in some ones life. Personally, I would back off. Keep your dignity. Give him space. Let him come to you all the way. Don't get excited over the first call. Make him work for you. You will feel so much better about yourself.
My relationship is quite different now that my mom is gone. It's like I started to get to know my hubs again. Hasn't always been a positive experience but it's still a work in progress.
If so, it must be very recent.