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After her spouse past 3 years ago.  She has COPD. She does well as long as home health care comes. But as soon as the stop so does she. Can't get her out if she want go anywhere. She is getting weaker by the day. At a loss on what to do next. She doesn't want to live with me (even though shes in my yard in a 5th wheel camper) but she doesn't take care of herself she wanted her place and I understand that but its hard to watch her just sitting all the time. It's starting to effect me and I can't let that happen. I have lost 30 pounds over the last 2 years I only weigh 92 lbs and 5'7" so I am almost down to. Just at a loss on what to do.

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Having a chronic illness can cause a lot of different feelings She could be depressed, as some others here have stated. You could offer to get her set up with a doctor to explore that and see if she needs counseling or medication, but, it's really up to her. Sometimes, others can't be as happy as we would want them to be. Sometimes, people just get tired or want to rest. Does she want any visitors? Would she be able to care for something like a pet? Not sure if that's allowed with COPD, but, maybe, something to keep her company might cheer her up and give her a reason to be more active. I know some people who have COPD and they tire easily and going out is a real big deal for them. Maybe, she really doesn't feel up for it.
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This sounds like depression. It might be difficult but make an appointment with her doctor for evaluation.
As a matter of fact if you call the doctors office and say you need the appointment for depression related concerns they will refer her right away or see her right away. Depression is one of the diagnosis that they do not delay about.
The goal with medication and therapy is to make her life better. It may take a while for medication to work and the first medication may not. But it will be worth it for her.
As for you..you should also contact your doctor and explain to your doctor the emotional stress that you are going through.
If your mom will not see her doctor you MUST see yours. They will help you cope with what your mom is going through.
I hate to bring up statistics but....often caregivers die before the person they are caring for simply because as caregivers we tend to neglect our own physical and emotional health.
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Is COPD her only diagnosis? It sounds like she is depressed, can you get her to see a geriatric psychologist/specialist?

Sometimes all we can do is live our lives and be ready to help when they need us. Don't do the same thing to yourself that she is doing in your worry for her.
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