A few comments at least from my point of view and what I went through. And this greatly depends on where mom is in her dementia. My Husband would not have understood a calendar. Time means nothing. What will happen hopefully is that she will settle into a routine and ask less and less about dad. The fact that she is still at home will give her a sense of place, a sense of "I belong here so it must be ok". The fact that she is with someone she knows will help a lot. This is different than if you were taking mom to a memory Care facility to live or even as a Respite stay. In that case she would probably take longer to settle in and be comfortable.
One more thought: dependent of course on her stage and ability to understand, you might make a nice big calendar for her, or even WITH her, and decorate it, so that each day you can mark off a day, and you can say what SHE and YOU did this day so you will remember to tell her hubby when he returns, and etc. Will give her something perhaps to cling to, and even remind her what day it is and what she is doing. Something writing or drawing "sets things in stone".
I understand your question...I would just be honest with your Mom that your Dad went on a 14 day trip and mark each day off on a calendar so your Mom can see the countdown to his return. I would assure her that he will be back, which you may have to do daily, hourly. Maybe he could bring her back a souvenir and you could tell her that so she has that to look forward to. Remind her that this is a good time for the two of you to spend some time together watching her favorite movies and such. Hope this helps! Glad your Dad can get away.
If mom asks where "George" is tell her.. "Dad went to the store. He will be back later." "Dad took the car in for service it might be a while be fore he gets back" "Dad went to the doctor's office"
With each reason that dad is gone you redirect. Use any of these at the end of one of the above "reasons" "Mom, let's go for a walk" "Mom let's start making dinner, can you help peel potatoes?" "Mom, Let's go get some ice cream"
Depending on how often you are with mom and dad the questions as to where he is might not be as much as you think. Keep the same schedule that dad normally does as best as you can. Keep mom occupied. When you feel like you have to scream or yell...walk out of the room.
I hope your dad gets well needed break and you and mom have no problems. (by the way make sure that you are authorized to consent to any emergency situation. Are you listed on her medical forms as a contact person? If she had to go to the ER are you a POA for Health? There are temporary forms on line that can be completed before dad leaves. But when he returns it might be a good idea to see an Elder Care Attorney if this paperwork has not been done yet)
Oh, easy one. Tell Mom that Dad had to go away to handle some business and will be back in two weeks. Meanwhile you two get some fun girl time. You know her best and know her limitations and her worries, and what stage she's at, what she can reason or retain, what activities she loves that you can stay engaged with her. Do write us if you come up with questions. Try to make it as much fun as you can for you both, and I can't tell you how much admiration you get from ME for letting this be the way for your Dad. My best to you.
And this greatly depends on where mom is in her dementia.
My Husband would not have understood a calendar.
Time means nothing.
What will happen hopefully is that she will settle into a routine and ask less and less about dad.
The fact that she is still at home will give her a sense of place, a sense of "I belong here so it must be ok". The fact that she is with someone she knows will help a lot.
This is different than if you were taking mom to a memory Care facility to live or even as a Respite stay. In that case she would probably take longer to settle in and be comfortable.
"Dad went to the store. He will be back later."
"Dad took the car in for service it might be a while be fore he gets back"
"Dad went to the doctor's office"
With each reason that dad is gone you redirect. Use any of these at the end of one of the above "reasons"
"Mom, let's go for a walk"
"Mom let's start making dinner, can you help peel potatoes?"
"Mom, Let's go get some ice cream"
Depending on how often you are with mom and dad the questions as to where he is might not be as much as you think.
Keep the same schedule that dad normally does as best as you can.
Keep mom occupied.
When you feel like you have to scream or yell...walk out of the room.
I hope your dad gets well needed break and you and mom have no problems.
(by the way make sure that you are authorized to consent to any emergency situation. Are you listed on her medical forms as a contact person? If she had to go to the ER are you a POA for Health? There are temporary forms on line that can be completed before dad leaves. But when he returns it might be a good idea to see an Elder Care Attorney if this paperwork has not been done yet)
Tell Mom that Dad had to go away to handle some business and will be back in two weeks. Meanwhile you two get some fun girl time.
You know her best and know her limitations and her worries, and what stage she's at, what she can reason or retain, what activities she loves that you can stay engaged with her.
Do write us if you come up with questions.
Try to make it as much fun as you can for you both, and I can't tell you how much admiration you get from ME for letting this be the way for your Dad. My best to you.
Best to you.
I'm glad your giving your mom a vacation, I'm sure it's needed.
I would start with YouTube Teepa Snow. She will explain it all.
Best of luck , keep us posted 😊