I am in the process of getting him in an agency and have a nurse come in and take care of him but MEDICAID has to come in and do an assessment and they are backed up 4-6 weeks and I don't have money to pay someone. I need help. I have to work and go to school and have no family in Virginia Beach to help me. He cannot be left alone and needs meals prepared and help with changing his pullups. I need help.
Go back to that hospital or doctor or agency & get them to help you.
Is he a veteran? Contact the VA.
Try your county's department of aging.
Contact your insurance company.
You should be able to take family leave time without losing your job ... but of course that doesn't pay the bills. I don't know what kind of work you do, but is it possible you could do some of it at home?
Can you skip a term in school, and get back to it as soon as you are able? Are there any on-line classes you could take while waiting to go back?
Is your husband already on Medicaid? In our case, they gave a temporary assessment based on the caseworker's observation. That was for 27 hours a week. Then when the assessment was officially made it was set at 32 hours a week. Discuss your emergency with the caseworker and see if there are any temporary solutions.
Like other caregiving spouses, you need to continue the work and school and homemaking you used to do. And you need to fill in doing the tasks that your husband used to be able to take care of. And you also take on the new task of caring for a sick adult. Triple whammy!
Do your best. If you have to temporarily give some things up don't beat yourself up or feel like a failure. We all have limits.
I wish you a speedy resolution to getting hubby's benefits established.
We have to realize that there comes a point when somethin's gotta give, Sounds like you've reached that point. If he CAN'T be left alone? Then . . .