Stella Rosa wine she drank. My father found her in her bedroom face down on floor. There was dry vomit near her. My dad speculate she choked on vomit She was diagnosed with bile duct cancer. Her death certificate : cardio pulmonary arrest and multiple organ failure.

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Sandy - please don't feel guilty. You didn't cause her death. She was 86 with multiple health issues hence the multiple organ failure.

Look on the bright side, she was able to enjoy her favorite wine on her last day. Not many people got that chance. Really.

Don't beat yourself up. There are much worse ways to check out, and hers wasn't bad at all.
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Reply to polarbear

Sounds Like she was on her way Out and perhaps in a Lot of Pain . The wine probably eased the Pain . Give yourself a break . I hope someone brings me wine when I am dying .
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Reply to KNance72

Sounds like you had a nice visit with Mom that she enjoyed as well. What a blessing to leave this life with the warm memory of a pleasant afternoon with her daughter. Be kind to yourself.
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Reply to JeanLouise

Your mother passed away due to 'cardio pulmonary arrest and multiple organ failure' brought on by bile duct cancer. You enjoyed a lovely visit with your mom that day whereby she enjoyed some wine. What you did is you made her last day on Earth nice & pleasant before God chose to take her Home. Please don't feel ANY guilt for spending that time with mom and allowing her to enjoy her favorite wine. Her health conditions were so far gone by then, that nothing could have saved her Sandy.

My condolences on your loss. Sending you a hug and a prayer for peace, knowing that you did nothing to contribute to mom's passing.
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Reply to lealonnie1

Look at it this way. A person with no health conditions could probably drink wine and have no ill effects. You didn't cause her health conditions and you meant well bringing her her favorite wine.

Don't beat yourself up about it. I'm sorry for your loss.
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Reply to Gershun

I’m sorry for your loss. My husband’s grandfather got up in the night to use the bathroom, fell and died. At the time we were all stunned and couldn’t believe this was how his life ended, it seemed so cruel. Now that we have the benefit of some time, and seeing some much crueler fates, we know this was a kind way to leave this world. It was quick and painless, here one minute and gone the next. I would think this was much like what your mother experienced. She was elderly with a rotten health issue, your brought her some joy, and then she left. I’m sure she knew your love. Please don’t waste time on the useless emotion of guilt for you did nothing wrong, spend time treasuring beloved memories instead. I wish you healing and peace
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Reply to Daughterof1930

No, you didn't cause mom's death. You made her last hours on earth pleasant & special.

My FIL drank a glass or three of wine every night. He died because he had leukemia and that's what took him.

She died because her life here was done. And having imbibed on some of her favorite wine just probably made the passing more pleasant.

I'm sorry for your loss. But, you didn't cause it.
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Reply to Midkid58

I agree look at it as a blessing. You had a good visit and she enjoyed her favorite wine.
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Reply to JoAnn29

I’m very sorry for your loss. As people age, their bodies can’t handle the effects of alcohol as well. Alcohol interacts with their medications, sometimes with disastrous effects. Several glasses of wine seems like quite a lot for a woman of her age and medical issues, but if she willingly imbibed it, that was her choice. Again, my condolences.
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Reply to Fawnby
JeanLouise Oct 24, 2022
Fawnby, I think this response is cruel. Why unnecessarily compound sandycody doubts? Does piling on help another sad soul? This is exactly why some people hesitate to reach out on this forum.
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The wine brought your mom some pleasure. Be happy that you gave her a chance to enjoy something she liked on her last day! What a gift to her. You certainly did not cause her death, she had bile duct cancer which sent her into multiple organ failure and cardiac arrest. She was able to toast her life thanks to you!!!!
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Reply to Tynagh

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