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I'm helping my Pop care for my mom who has dementia. About a month ago a word would come out of my mouth when I intended to say something else. I am catching myself and correcting it but, sometimes, It takes me a few tries to find the right word. I'm worried I'm getting dementia. I'm in menopause; could it be that?

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In college, I had a professor who explained it like this:

If you forget where you put your keys, it’s just forgetting.

If you forget what keys are for, that’s Alzheimer’s.
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Belsnickles Jul 2022
This was my father exactly. Got in the car, keys in hand, had no idea what to do with them or what they were for.
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It could be. It could also be something called "IO dementia"--your INPUT far exceeds your 'ouput'. In easier terms, you're burnt out. More info is coming in than your brain can process.

When I talk to my mom, SHE has a teribble time finding the right words. After about a half hour, I am as bad as she is! Trying to help her wears me out.

Also, after chemo, I have permanent brain fog. Combined with COVID brain fog and somedays I can't remember my own name.

Get checked out if it's really bothering you. Likely it's just part of the loveliness of getting older.
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VVinAshland Jul 2022
This is insightful. God bless your recovery, MidKid58. Thank you.
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VVinAshland, I have worked outside of the home my whole adult life except for the past two years, and I miss the work related conversations. I believe now that is the reason that no one dares try to speak to me at the start of the mornings, as my brain had taken a detour somewhere.

One thing I learned, if I think I might be getting dementia, then I'm not. Because those who do have dementia do not realize that they have that condition.
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VVinAshland Jul 2022
Supper helpful. Thank you!
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I've had that problem since I started having kids nearly 30 years ago.

A friend once told me that she read a woman gives about 1/8 of her brain cells to the child she's carrying. In my case, that means almost half my brain went to my three kids.

It explains a lot.

I wouldn't worry.
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VVinAshland Jul 2022
Thank you so much. You must have some pretty bright kids!
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I would say its Stress even if you don't think caring for Mom is stressful. I am 72 and for me even having something change my routine stresses me out.

I am with Tothill. Get a physical that includes a full lab work up. B12 does effect cognitivity. Thyroid effects the body in many ways. Low Potassium.
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VVinAshland Jul 2022
Thank you for sharing your expertise with me, JoAnn29.
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What FreqFlyer said, and double the emphasis.

The last several years, this year and I'm guessing upcoming years are raising so many issues that affect our daily lives that it's literally overwhelming.

Our parents didn't grow up with 24/7 "news" stations, some with "anchors" who in my opinion deliberately stoke the news to draw out friction, conflicts, and reel us in. Watch the expressions on the faces of some of the anchors; it's as if they're trying to hypnotize people with their intense glares.

There are also regular if not constant reports on negative actions, hostilities with other nations, mass killings in the US, youngsters shooting other youngsters and more awful situations.

Our minds are I think being directed toward those mass events; I even begin to wonder if I'll be able to get in and out of the grocery store w/o being assaulted or robbed. I never thought that way before "information" became so prolific and aggressively integrated into daily life.

We live in much different times than those in which we grew up. Life then now seems so simplified. I think we need to make very selective decisions about what we need and don't need to know, such as all this "influencer" nonsense and apparent followings of someone who in my opinion hasn't accomplished much to broadcast or generate a following, as well as all the friction here and in other jurisdictions and countries.

Anyone remember how Steve Jobs was applauded and sometimes revered, despite his challenging personality? But look what he created. Think of others who have advanced life, technology, medicine and more. These are major contributors to enhancement of life, yet that concept seems to have been mixed, blended or subordinated to people with more dramatic activities.

When I studied French decades ago, I found myself thinking and blending French into my English conversations. When I studied German, then it was English, French and German that became blended. They were on my mind. But what's on the minds of people today?

I've been thinking of trying to get back into law firms for part time jobs, just b/c I would have access to stimulating issues and people.
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PatsyN Jul 2022
Clearly you're getting your "news" from the wrong place.
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Perimenopause/menopause definitely changes your brain. As we age, fluidity of every body function declines, generally.
Fatigue, boredom, emotional distress, distraction, frustration, impatience, etc. can all interfere with word finding. The brain has to use a certain amount of energy to suppress/ignore those unacceptable thoughts and feelings when they arise.
Also, it is very common for adults past 50 to start losing 'nouns'. Proper names and place names go first, along with nouns that you rarely use in speech. (We use fewer words in ordinary speech than the number of words we can read or understand when we hear them.)
Cross word puzzles can help with word retrieval, word jumbles help with processing the letters and sounds to make words, and even word search puzzles help you 'see' words and remind the brain that this is a word.
Singing can be easier to help with finding words...and for someone with dementia to process/express ideas.
Singing along to familiar tunes helps with language fluidity.
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VVinAshland Jul 2022
Thank you for sharing your expertise with me, Clairesmum. I appreciate it!
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I found that perimenopause plus family duties/crisis/caregiving etc…at the same time created a perfect storm for peri symptoms for me!

And this is out of left field but may apply to some; I have ADHD ( more formal diagnosis was a big relief honestly) and do okay with organization albeit at great cost. Managing the minutia of my mom’s life is like ADHD kryptonite I’ve learned, and when I’m more stressed my ability to stay on track verbally or mentally or whatnot gets even more derailed. A lot of forgetfulness !!!

Anyhoo ADHD and caregiving are a whole other Thing….The bigger point is you’re not crazy! I love the B12 suggestions too.

Wishing you the best!
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Dianed58 Jul 2022
You are so right!

Menopause plus managing an elder's care can be kryptonite for one's memory. Add a tendency to ADD - and it's a perfect storm!

Been there...still there.
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Please do not be afraid to go to your doctor for a full lab work up.

In my mid 40's I thought I was losing my mind. I was so incredibly forgetful. I was in tears at my doctor's office. My doctor reassured me that it was unlikely to be early onset dementia and sent for for lab work. Turned out I had B12 anemia. All I needed was extra B12 and all the symptoms went away.
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VVinAshland Jul 2022
Super helpful and hopeful! Thank you.
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I like this article b/c it also gives an example of a typical age-related change in addition to a possible sign of Alz/dementia:

Memory loss that disrupts daily life may be a symptom of Alzheimer's or other dementia. Alzheimer's is a brain disease that causes a slow decline in memory, thinking and reasoning skills. There are 10 warning signs and symptoms. If you notice any of them, don't ignore them. Schedule an appointment with your doctor.

1
Memory loss that disrupts daily life
One of the most common signs of Alzheimer’s disease, especially in the early stage, is forgetting recently learned information. Others include forgetting important dates or events, asking the same questions over and over, and increasingly needing to rely on memory aids (e.g., reminder notes or electronic devices) or family members for things they used to handle on their own.
What's a typical age-related change?
Sometimes forgetting names or appointments, but remembering them later.

2
Challenges in planning or solving problems
Some people living with dementia may experience changes in their ability to develop and follow a plan or work with numbers. They may have trouble following a familiar recipe or keeping track of monthly bills. They may have difficulty concentrating and take much longer to do things than they did before.
What's a typical age-related change?
Making occasional errors when managing finances or household bills.

3
Difficulty completing familiar tasks 
People with Alzheimer's often find it hard to complete daily tasks. Sometimes they may have trouble driving to a familiar location, organizing a grocery list or remembering the rules of a favorite game.
What's a typical age-related change?
Occasionally needing help to use microwave settings or to record a TV show.

4
Confusion with time or place
People living with Alzheimer's can lose track of dates, seasons and the passage of time. They may have trouble understanding something if it is not happening immediately. Sometimes they may forget where they are or how they got there.
What's a typical age-related change?
Getting confused about the day of the week but figuring it out later.

5
Trouble understanding visual images and spatial relationships
For some people, having vision problems is a sign of Alzheimer's. This may lead to difficulty with balance or trouble reading. They may also have problems judging distance and determining color or contrast, causing issues with driving.
What's a typical age-related change?
Vision changes related to cataracts.

6
New problems with words in speaking or writing
People living with Alzheimer's may have trouble following or joining a conversation. They may stop in the middle of a conversation and have no idea how to continue or they may repeat themselves. They may struggle with vocabulary, have trouble naming a familiar object or use the wrong name (e.g., calling a "watch" a "hand-clock").
What's a typical age-related change?
Sometimes having trouble finding the right word.

7
Misplacing things and losing the ability to retrace steps
A person living with Alzheimer's disease may put things in unusual places. They may lose things and be unable to go back over their steps to find them again. He or she may accuse others of stealing, especially as the disease progresses.
What's a typical age-related change?
Misplacing things from time to time and retracing steps to find them.

8
Decreased or poor judgment
Individuals may experience changes in judgment or decision-making. For example, they may use poor judgment when dealing with money or pay less attention to grooming or keeping themselves clean.
What's a typical age-related change?
Making a bad decision or mistake once in a while, like neglecting to change the oil in the car.

Continued....
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VVinAshland Jul 2022
Thank you again!
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