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My mom is 74, lives in her own home and still works full time. Her PCP has previously dismissed her concerns of memory issues as nothing to worry about. But she just called me very scared and I'm now very concerned.


She took a nap after work today, when she woke up she thought it was Sunday a.m. & she was late for work. This has happened before, she's even started getting ready for work before like she did today. She called them to say she was due in at 7 but it was that time already so she'd be a little late. Then rushed to get her work clothes, shove down her breakfast and her morning meds. It wasn't till work called her back to let her know, it was still Sat, eve and she'd already been in today, that she realized what happened.


She had to call me to have me, someone she trusts, tell her it was indeed still Sat. She even asked if I was her daughter when I answered my phone.


Is this what sundowning is like? If so what do we do? She has an appointment with her family Dr. on Tuesday.

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I’m not sure what to say re: sundowning. I, myself, have woken disoriented, and my mother’s sundowning presented as a more generalized agitation and paranoia.

I bought my mother a digital calendar clock. It looks like an iPad but is display only. The screen says the day of the week, full date, numerical time and the time of day in words.

For example: Saturday, July 15, 2023, 7:37pm, evening. (in big, clear text)

Perhaps such a device would be helpful and reassuring.
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I would take her for a full physical. My Dad would be disoriented when he woke up. The problem was his carotid artery in his neck. Not enough oxygen to the brain. Mom is 74 and still working. It could be causing her stress and stress does a lot for the body.

No, this is not sundowning. IMO, again Mom needs to see a doctor and he needs to be told about her being disoriented after napping.
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I agree with JoAnn, this needs to be checked out medically.

You need to emphasize to the doctor that this is an issue that has happened several times and that her lack of orientation to her environment (not being able to determine on her own, using logic, what day it is and what time it is) means that she needs a work up for UTI, to rule out TIAs, carotid issues and cognitive impairment.

Don't let him brush this off.
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My MIL did the exact same thing, at least once that we know of. She argued to the hilt with anyone who tried to tell her she had just woekn from a nap and it was still the same day.

She went as far as to call the local TV station to ask why the am news wasn't, on. Had her neighbor run over the morning's newspaper, same date as the one she had. She called the newspaper and THEY ran her a new copy of the same day. She called her daughter who told her it was still Friday. Even when the sun went down, she thought it was the next day.

Even with all this evidence to the 'truth' she didn't believe anyone.

Looking back, I think this is when her memory issues became really obvious to us all.

Definitely have her checked. This isn't sundowning--it's something else. Best to talk to her Dr.
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Anabanana Jul 16, 2023
We went through this with my mother! Early in her dementia she was certain everything was a scam or conspiracy. She became determined to publicly expose the newspaper for delivering old news. I dreaded the sight of her approaching me, waving the newspaper, demanding justice. We bought her a digital calendar clock, hoping she’d view it as a neutral source of info. All she saw was that the manufacturer was in cahoots with the newspaper publisher. And I couldn’t be trusted either.
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A relative began waking from a nap & occasionally thinking it was a new day. Recent vision loss, a dull sky outside probably factors. Appears the body's internal clock (short term memory) has become somewhat faulty. No cause found as yet but recent diagosis of illness & possible medication changes may also be factors.

I hope a medical review is able to help your Mother.
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I have fallen asleep and was unsure of day/date or time when I woke up.
I chalked it up to having had a good deep restful nap.

Her doctor should NEVER dismiss concerns that a patient has. If this happened on several occasions it would have me looking for another PCP.

This does not sound like "Sundowning" to me. Sundowning typically is more anxiety related.

The fact that she is 74, still working FULL TIME and got work clothes on, called work, made and ate breakfast...this does not sound like someone that has problems with ADL's, knowing what to do, when to do it, how to do it.

You mention other instances but give no details other than it has happened before. And if it has happened in the same manner, after a nap where she may have been in a deep sleep. I might not be overly concerned. It might be one of the tests that she needs is a sleep study. If she is not getting proper sleep at night she may be getting her deep sleep at another time of day.

Are you going with her to her appointment on Tuesday?
If so I am going to give you homework.
THINK...
Think back over all the little instances that you can think of over the past year. Are there any things that you brushed off as "no big deal" but then ignored it, or "that was odd for mom to do, or say" but then you ignored it.
Any times you looked at mom and wondered why she was wearing _____? but then ignored it.
Any times you went into her house and thought.."I wonder why those bills have not been paid? Any time the water, gas, electricity, paper were cut because of not being paid?
Any time you went into the house and wondered why there was spoiled food in the fridge?
Has she lost or gained weight? (forgetting to eat or eating more than she should because she forgot she ate)
Anything else that is in the back of your mind....?
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