Hi there,
I'm a reporter for a show on national public radio working on a story about managing an elderly person's finances. If you manage the money for someone else, how do you decide what's OK to spend the money on? Are there tough choices or it it pretty clear? Can you pay yourself to take care of them? What if family members disagree on how to spend the money? What if someone accuses you of spending the money incorrectly? What are the legal and ethical issues you think about? I'm looking to speak with people who have faced these questions in the past or are currently struggling with difficult decisions. I'm reachable at tsamuelson at marketplace dot org. Many thank in advance to anyone willing to share their experiences.
When my mother-in-law's Alzheimer's progressed we had to move her from her own home and across the country to be near us, she lived with us for the first couple of years. No charge, she paid for her own clothes, and other personal items. Then she moved into an assisted living facility about a mile away. It was the nicest in town and close so that we could pick her up on our way out on errands and the such. Her money paid for this. We could have picked out a MUCH cheaper place, but you get what you pay for and we felt her money should be used for her and not saved for us to inherit later. The company owns a lovely multi-tier care set up all on the same property. As her needs increased she stepped through their different care facilities until she died a few years later. We always kept true to her way of doing things where her money was concerned. We she never lacked for anything, we didn't pay our selves for her care. We aren't perfect, we just did things the way that seemed right and honest and loving. It was her money to be used for her care and happiness. We would be happy to have our children treat us the very same way, should the need ever arise.