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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
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This is often a neurologically based behavior. You can ask her doctors or a speech therapist if there is anything that can be done about it but there probably isn't. This behavior is unpleasant and is likely to be embarrassing to you as well as frustrating since efforts to get her to stop are likely not to work.
My mother-in-law spits when watching TV. She doesn't bother with a tissue. She just spits constantly onto the carpet. I feel like I am living in a barn. She takes her teeth out while we are finishing dinner. I lose my appetite. Finally, she can fart all four stanzas of the Star Spangled Banner when she gets up or sits down. That might be due to meds and loss of muscle tone at 97 but mostly, she has always been uninhibited, even when she was younger. I am living in a barn now with no real civilization and no relief in sight. I hate every moment of it. When I tell her to stop spitting, she just gives me the evil eye and hurls another lunger into the rug. Try handing her a tissue. Resist the urge to stuff the whole box of them up her a--.
When I brought 92 year old dad home from an assisted living facility, he was spitting all over the house. The more that we hollered the worse he became, so, I figured out what dad likes to do, and if he spits into an emesis basin, cup, etc. (along with a wash cloth or a napkin), then, he remembers to do so. Positive reinforcement does work at times!
I totally understand: My dad is a WWII vet and he does not let me forget it on a daily basis. (Yes, he will try both my husband and me and be VERY demanding.) I always attempt humor in any manner. Perhaps you might say something like, "Mom, please let me know when you finish spitting all over the carpet and then, you can either pay to get it professionally cleaned or replaced if needed." My dad told me this a.m. that I was, "Better than nothing (and, he laughed,"), so, I laughed with him and told him that he had that one exactly right! As a nurse, I've had some very difficult patients in the past and when you can take a few moments of time to listen to what they are concerned about, and get into "sync" with their sense of humor, it works 99.9% of the time!
scratchy01, I see that your husband has dementia. Swallowing problems often occur in that disease, particularly in advanced stages. My husband needed to spit a lot and he was still lucid enough to want to be civilized. He carried a big plastic bowl around with him and spit into it. When he started putting his tissues in there I used a plastic bag to line the bowl and changed it frequently. It was his portable spittoon. But of course the person must be willing and able to cooperate.
On hospice this became more frequent and bothered him more. The nurse provided something to keep his mouth drier, as ShotintheDark suggests.
Thank you for this suggestion. I am glad it worked for you. We hand MIL a tissue but she stuffs them into the sofa and continues to spit on the rug. One of my mother-in-law's traits (incredible stubbornness) served her well in escaping life during World War II but being needy narcissistic and stubborn now is hurting her more than helping her. She pretends not to speak English when in the hospital but she does, she refuses physical therapy so she is losing function, she was an only child and had a bad marriage so made her only child (my son) her substitute husband. Now all this comes back to haunt her. She won't go to adult day care. She won't visit friends or allow us to invite them here to see her. She resist therapy. I can't be all to her now.
Same problem here. Husband is 88 and started doing this about a month ago. It is almost constant and totally disgusting. Hardly uses a tissue, spits in waste paper baskets, on the rugs, out the car window...wherever he happens to be. It is driving me crazy...
LOOK into dementia medications that in mild doses also have a side effect of causing dry mouth.... i am not a physician but there are some meds that can slightly alter their behaviour and with a dry mouth its hard to spit....
My mother does the exact same thing. I read that it could be a problem swallowing but she has no problem swallowing food. Her spit is pretty thick and gross so maybe it has something to do with the spit itself. We should probably try to get her to drink more water. But she does all those same things, won't spit in a tissue even if she has one in her hand but rather on the floor next to where she is sitting. Even if she is standing in the bathroom, won't spit in the sink, rather on the floor. Restaurants, church, other people's houses, same thing. She spits everywhere.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Try handing her a tissue. Resist the urge to stuff the whole box of them up her a--.
On hospice this became more frequent and bothered him more. The nurse provided something to keep his mouth drier, as ShotintheDark suggests.