My 91-yr-old Mom who lives with my husband and me often wears loose, open-backed sandals. She knows she is even less steady (wobbly) on her feet and shuffles since her slight stroke. I have told her the sandals don't look safe to me the way she walks and home health care therapists I've asked in front of her tell her THEY don't feel the sandals are safe either. Mom stopped using her walker sooner than they recommended as well. But Mom insists that SHE is careful and SHE doesn't plan to fall. It seems the therapists are working with what she is willing to do or not do as Mom seems determined to do things her own way. I am concerned and wish, with their expertise, that they would be a little more insistent.
My sister said in the end maybe we should just let her fall. My brother, a neurologist who lives 4 hrs. away, said arguing about it will just cause hard feelings and perhaps the most I can do is to let her know how much better I would feel if she wouldn't wear them. He said in his experience that most people one would think might fall -- don't. Mom and I have had a few discussions about all of this already. If Mom WERE to fall, I would be the one taking care of all of the many details that might incur. Naturally, I'd love to just get rid of the sandals, but it seems that this is Mom's choice to make. Any suggestions - or has anyone had similar dilemmas?
Tough love time!! You can not let her fall..
It sure is mentally exhausting being a caregiver. Good luck. I hope you win this battle...
Can you ask her what she likes about wearing them? Are they cool and airy? Easy to get on and off? Is there a chance she could get that benefit in a shoe with more support? A strappy sandal like a Teva, or a moccasin with a back? Try to let her make the decision, so she doesn't just get stubborn. Sorry.