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We live in Texas. No money. All children must work. Any suggestions?

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When my Mom entered NH I asked about falls because in 4 months being at the AL she had 4 falls. With all she was sent to ER and no broken bones. When I asked the AL staff why she was sent out the answer was she had pain. Of course she had pain, wouldn't you if you fell. I told them give her time. If she is still complaining about pain, then send her out. I then told them to call me before she was sent out. I would determine if she needed to be sent out. (I would send my RN daughter over) Head injury you always send out. She wasn't sent out after that.

The NH told me they only send out if the resident hits their head. Otherwise, they observe the resident to see if they show signs of pain.

If Mom is not using a wheelchair, maybe she should be. On Moms there was an alarm that warned the staff she was getting up. My daughter says, they will fall. She turned her head for a second and in that time the resident stood up and fell. It will happen. Moving Mom will not make a difference.
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I would look into speaking with the director of the facility. Medicare or not, it’s a liability issue. So that should not warrant anything.. sadly, it does. I also would transfer if you can.
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Should have said Mom/ Family does not have money for private care. In long term nursing home, Alzheimer’s locked unit. Am trying to find out if there is another/different type of facility beyond long term, Alzheimer’s locked unit. NH is sending her ER. To get locked unit had to send Mom to facility 90 minutes away so not able to meet her at ER as we could when she was local. Asked question after long night worried about Mom having another ER alone; very upset and worried not knowing if there is another answer out there for her. I did find some things in the responses that I can look into and very much appreciate the support. Feeling so inadequate and alone.
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Your profile says that your mom is in a nursing home. Is she on Medicaid or private pay?

Why are you stating that you don’t have money? You are not responsible for her bills.

If she isn’t on Medicaid and her money runs out, please apply for it so she can continue receiving care.

As far as falls go, they are extremely common and I don’t know how you can possibly prevent them from occurring.

Falls are frightening for everyone involved, for the person who falls, for family members as well because every fall has a potential risk for serious injuries.

My mom went to the ER with falls, she needed staples in her head.

Another time she was transported from the hospital to a skilled nursing facility for rehabilitation.

Mom had Parkinson’s disease and PT and OT helped with strength and balance issues.

Has your mom ever done rehab to help her with specific needs?

Not every fall that my mom had required a trip to the ER. They still require help getting up though and are often bruised and sore afterwards.

What exactly are you concerned about?
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Once mom went into a wheelchair full time after 50 falls, I thought THANK GOD now the nightmare falls will stop. They did not. They increased w her dementia and thinking she could walk when she couldn't. She went on to fall another 45x in under 3 yrs time. I had PTSD from the Memory Care calling me, once 3x in ONE DAY for 3 separate falls. They never transported her to the ER for a fall bc she NEVER hit her head. She did wind up with broken ribs and sternum bones all in various levels of healing which was found on imaging scans while she was hospitalized for pneumonia. 😑 Her girls, as she called staff, would apply Icy Hot and things to her bruised areas. It was all a big ball of chaos, tbh.

The answer is, you can do nothing about falls. Just leave it all in God's hands and request the RN on staff check her out before automatically schlepping her to the ER each time.

Best of luck with a difficult situation

** this seems to be a question about $$$ yet is worded differently from the title. Are the mods "helping the OP out again here "? 😑
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lkdrymom Mar 2023
I'm glad someone else noticed this. So many questions ending with "What do I do?" that is seems like a fake post. Nothing wrong with just stating a situation in the title without a question as far as I am concerned. I stopped reading a lot of those that end with 'what do i do" because I thought they were fake.
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Sandj,

Am assuming Mom is on medicare and other insurance or medicaid. If she is or is not, no money means no bills get paid. YOU, as her children are not responsible for her bills.

Sorry about my post below, apparently meant for another question on AC. I am sorry your mom is falling so often. I am curious about the being sent to ER so frequently for these falls. While the facility should notify you of falls, if there is no pain, nothing appears broken, and there is no injury to the HEAD, there are often no transports to the ER. Falls can be very frequent for elders with dementia. The balance becomes quite poor.

ER can check out your Mom and transport her back to her facility. I am not certain what else CAN be done if her facility sends her in to the ER. The good news is that they will likely quickly assess her.

You might consider discussing medications with the facility. If she is on anything that is increasing dizziness or falls, if she is on blood pressure medications that are "bottoming out the pressure" and etc. This should be done at the leisure of whomever is the POA for medical care. Time need not be taken off work. And you need not rush to the ER every time Mom goes there. They can return her to her facility or admit her as needed.
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Post a little sketchy really need more info.

Is Mom in a Assisted living or Memory care? Her money is running out or has run out? If this is the situation, she needs to go on Medicaid in a Long-term care facility that excepts Medicaid. If she has been paying privately for her care for at least 2yrs, she may be able to stay where she is with Medicaid paying if your State allows it. And if the facility she is allows Medicaid.

Talk to the Director/Administrator to see what they say.
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Medicaid placement. Palliative care for anything medical in the future through agreement with his MD and his guardian or next of kin.

The children must get on with their lives making what loving visits they are able without expectations of improvement.

I am so dreadfully sorry for your grief, for standing witness to this loss for your father. So very sorry.
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AlvaDeer Mar 2023
So sorry. Meant this response for another poster, apparently.
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Is there something by way of suggestions that you’re looking for?

It seems from your description that you may be doing the best you can.

If not, what would you be looking to change?
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